Then, at a meeting I heard someone mention the 13th Step. What!? There’s another step I have to do? I asked what the 13th Step was.
“It’s hitting on newcomers – hooking up with newbies,” I was told.
“Ah,” a much younger and better looking me said to myself. “That’s why all these guys are giving me hugs and buying me coffee.”
I stopped hugging guys that creeped me out – stuck out my hand instead. I learned the true understanding of “helping the newcomer.”
I listened to my sponsor and old-timers I trusted: “You don’t get into relationships or date when you are in early recovery.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Because nothing will take your mind off your recovery quicker than a guy,” I was told. “And besides, you have demonstrated and extraordinary inability to have a healthy relationship. Your picker is broken.”