child photoI have a dissociative disorder that includes multiple personalities. Here are poems from my 8-year-old personality, C.  (I use their initials when writing about them online).

I hope they can help reveal the experience of dissociation. I have been having her write poetry as part of the processing of merging out personalities. Through these poems she is exploring her emotions so then we can talk about her feelings.


You can try

To destroy me with words

I’m still here


If I’m smart

Why can’t I figure out

How to be wanted?


“Safe Face”


I wear my safe face

If I keep my face blank

Then they won’t notice

Their words hurt me


If I keep my face blank

Then Mom won’t see the bad things

Inside me


If I keep my face blank

I can float along,

Not make any more waves

While on the inside

I cry


“My mouth”


My fingers are too short

To play the piano well enough

But they will grow


My mouth is not brave enough

To call out for help

Maybe it will learn to shout

Maybe it will learn that silence

Is safety and pain at the same time




Red car idles outside

I finish my homework and look up

Mother’s face is turned away