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Be The Gift You Want To See In The World

The stretch from Halloween through Thanksgiving, leading into Black Friday, and culminating with Christmas and New Years is the most commercialized and materialistic time period in our American culture. Every year I resist the urge to take advantage of those super “too good to be true” deals on Black Friday, but I usually give in.

I also spent a lot of time with family this past week reflecting on what we are grateful for, and nurturing relationships that sustain us far beyond the material things. What I realized is that giving that perfect gift is great, but being a gift to my family, friends, and co-workers is so much more important. Do you want to be a gift to those around you this holiday season?

Do more of…

  • Affirming the positive qualities in others
  • Listening, asking curious questions, and showing interest in others
  • Making promises and keeping them
  • Sharing what’s really on your heart; joys, fears, aspirations, dreams
  • Being vulnerable and transparent
  • Being still, being present

Do less of…

  • Talking about yourself
  • Waiting for others to stop talking so you can talk more about yourself
  • Noticing what’s missing or what’s wrong
  • Being late, being rushed, being distracted
  • Worrying about everything being just right
  • Worrying about what others think

I’m going to take next week off to work on being a better gift. See you again in 2019!

Be The Gift You Want To See In The World

Nathan Regier

Nate Regier, PhD is CEO and Co-founding owner of Next Element, a global leadership communication firm specializing in building cultures of Compassionate Accountability®. A former practicing clinical psychologist, Dr. Regier splits his time between writing, speaking, training, consulting, and developing Next Element's global network of certified trainers. He is co-developer of the Leading Out of Drama® training and coaching system for positive conflict, and has authored two books on drama and conflict; Beyond Drama: Transcending Energy Vampires, and Conflict Without Casualties: A Field Guide For Leading With Compassionate Accountability. Nate is a certifying master trainer in the Process Communication Model®. He lives in Newton, KS, is married and has three daughters. Learn more about Conflict Without Casualties here.

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APA Reference
Regier, N. (2018). Be The Gift You Want To See In The World. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 21, 2020, from


Last updated: 15 Nov 2018
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