Today is one of those days.
Something’s going to happen…
Not here. Not to me directly. I’m worried about it and I won’t even be here to worry about it.
My anxiety and I will be traveling around downtown on the TTC again in the sweltering heat because that’s the way my life is these days.
Distraction is the best way for me to deal with anxiety…
I knit. I observe. I people-watch. I try to engage people in conversation, but very few people like to chat these days. People hate to pick up phones. I detest email. It’s toneless.
Conversation seems to be a dying art.
Later this evening, which is why I’m weighing in now at 8:30 a.m. with this post, I’ll attend a closing meeting of a charity for which I volunteer. Actually, it’s an evening to honour the dedicated teachers who work at the Cabbagetown Community Arts Centre (CCAC).
Volunteering is and always has been a part of my life. It’s important to feel part of a community even though, in this case, Cabbagetown is not my geographical community. I love being involved in community service.
And I love Cabbagetown…
Cabbagetown is very old Victorian Toronto. And a real community. Very few of them exist anymore in Toronto and Cabbagetown is one of them. Everyone knows everyone in Cabbagetown. People care about each other there. It’s a friendly place filled with all kinds of people from every possible socioeconomic and ethnic background. It’s fascinating. Safe. Quite magical in tone, as communities go.
The CCAC is a tiny grassroots arts organization where we try to help kids who might be considered at risk to find a focus in their often challenging lives through music. We provide them with all kinds of music lessons at a fraction of the cost. Almost nothing, in some cases.
This, too, will be a distraction from what is going to happen today. I cannot tell you about it.
So, I try not to think about it.
Tools of my distraction…
Distraction is a great tool when I’m feeling an urge to eat. It creates delay and the urge subsides.
I have lots of distraction tools in my “emotional toolbox” ~ walking the dogs, knitting and crocheting, reading, walking by myself, grooming my dogs, having a manicure, writing to you, journaling and volunteering. Sometimes I find someone to talk to other than Marty, though he’s utterly charming. Sometimes I cook, but being around food and in the kitchen is not always where I want to be.
So I am left today with the my anxiety and my distractions. And the heat in Cabbagetown.
The best thing about distractions…
Often my worries and anxieties turn out not to be as frightening or ominous as I fear they will be.
Perhaps that will happen today.
Have a good one and keep cool.
Image: Cabbagetown Property