Divorce, A Personal Story from Someone Living With Chronic Pain


Today I have been released, officially, of my marriage.  I am divorced.  I have prepared myself emotionally and mentally to say that, so I do so with some sense of acceptance and peace.  I was allowed, by the judge, to return to being me (my maiden name).  The irony of that is not lost on me.  I lost myself in my marriage and subsequent illnesses and pain.  Now, with permission, I can return to being me.

In June, less than two weeks after my...

Chronic Pain

Living with Disability and Its Affect on Relationships

Having a disability, be it medical or psychological, can put a strain on relationships.  I am not just talking about marriages or romantic relationships.  All forms of communication and relationships can suffer when someone is going through a hard time.

In my case (of course it would be my case, it’s my blog), I have noticed changes in various relationships that I have with friends and family.  It can be broken down into different categories,...

Chronic Pain

Mourning 2013 for a Better New Year

First, although this is a post about New Year’s Eve/Day, I once again reiterate the fact that it is a ridiculous and stupid holiday.  It is the ONLY day of the year that we celebrate the fact that it is 12:00.  So, ranting aside, yesterday was New Year’s Eve and it got me to thinking about New Year’s Resolutions.  Normally, this would be a post about...

Chronic Pain

Merry Melancholy and the Holiday Blues- Part I

Maybe I am the Grinch.  Maybe Scrooge had it right when he said “Bah-Humbug.”  What is it about the most wonderful time of the year that makes it so depressing?  My home is decorated beautifully. The smells of (fake) pine and hot apple cider (scented candles) permeate the house…on the outside everything looks merry and bright.  But on the inside,...

Chronic Pain

Holiday Depression

This time of year, when everything is supposed to be “merry and bright,” can be an incredibly painful, lonely and depressing time of year for so many people.  This has been, by far, the most difficult year I have faced and the holidays are making that even more noticeable....

Chronic Pain

Making Friends with your Pain

I was talking to a friend a while back and he said, “It must be difficult to live with pain.”

As many of you know, I have drastically changed my way of thinking and living when it comes to my perspective and how I view life.  I was quite shocked when I heard myself say, “Well, after a while you start...

Chronic Pain

Internalizing Chronic Pain

Recently I returned to physical therapy because the whiplash from my car accident has gotten to an unbearable level.  Part of my program involved a massage where the therapist works on the areas that are causing pain.  I had an interesting interaction the other day.  The therapist was working on the nerves in my neck and it hurt like he!!.  As he was working he finally said,...

Chronic Pain

When You Miss Out On Life

I apologize for doing a way back Wednesday post, however, I had a car accident last week and am suffering from whipash that is very painful and am unable to sit for very long.  No worries though, I have plenty to write about as soon as I can sit down to write!  For now, wnjoy some oldies but goodies and talk among yourselves!

When you have a physical limitation or disability it can really, well… stink to miss out on certain things in life.  Everything I do has to be planned out.  If I am going out for an afternoon I have to be sure to have my medication and my seat cushion.  I need to know how long I will be in the car and how long I will be walking, sitting and standing.  The unfortunate truth is that disability can sometimes mean that you have to forgo things in life that you really want to do.  From the minor things, like a day trip to the city, going shopping or vacations, to the major things, like having a family or a career.

So how do you deal with the letdowns?  How do you stop fearing that life is passing you by while others live it?  I wish I had an answer, but truthfully, living with a disability makes me sad because there are many times I feel like I have gone AWOL on my own life.