6 Comments to
What No One Ever Told You About Sex Addiction

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  1. Such an interesting topic. I have a friend who was adopted by a woman who was quite “cold”. He ended up getting involved in pornography in the 1970’s by getting a job in a movie theatre in Kings Cross [Sydney] where he became a voyeur of porn movies. This addiction carried into his adult life where finally he was charged and arrested with downloading child porn onto his home computer. Since that time he has never been able to get a job and he has never really thought what he did was wrong. Perhaps addressing his issues earlier on might have helped him.

    • That’s a sad story Sue, and I agree. It’s so important for folks who are caught in this cycle to know that there are answers, and they can heal. Thanks for your comment!

  2. Hi Jonice.

    Good topic. And confirms things for me.

    Im a sex addict, and have been involved in 12 Step groups for some time and have been experiencing recovery from the addiction. I had no idea why I was acting this way, and my life was out of control. In the process ive found that allot is missing inside, which lead me to read Running on Empty. The book revolutionised the way I see my childhood, and ive been slooowly making changes. Im still not there yet. So many questions that are difficult to find any answers to…

    Coming to terms with the fact that things were missing, and that the addiction is a way of numbing that pain, or creating an inner sense of “value”, has been a long process. “Acting out sexually” creates that illusion that you are connecting with someone. That you are loved. Even though it is not a “real” connection. It makes sense when the connection with parents didnt exist, as one would desperately try to replace that emptiness caused by a lack of “love”. Its also a way to escape unmanageable pain.

    As I said, vast majoirty of other addicts I know have had tough family upbringings, whether there was abuse, or whether they were not allowed to share emotions with their parents or other family. The two do go hand-in-hand. But unlike Alcoholism, and other addictions, sex addiction is extremely taboo, and is not really talked about. So its a secret struggle that you cant share with many people.

    So I want to say “thank you” Jonice for the article, and for connecting the dots.

    Cheers

    • Dear D, thank you so much for sharing your story with us. I know that many who read this will relate greatly with you. I’m so glad you’re looking inside for answers, and getting help. Keep up the good work! Sending you all my best wishes.

  3. Interesting discussion on CEN and sex addiction. Life after Lust looks like a book worth checking out. There is also another helpful book for pornography and sex addicts. The book Power Over Pornography use cognitive behavior therapy in a unique application that helps addicts deal effectively with the urge. I recommend it.

 

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