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It’s Okay If You Don’t Have It All Figured Out

Growing up, many of us have this picture of what our lives are going to look like – working in a job we love, making lots of money, having an incredible relationship – whatever it may be. But things don’t always pan out the way we hoped.

We look around and see people who “have it all”, wondering why that amazing job, relationship or more money hasn’t happened for us yet. So often this is the case, when people in our lives are at a high point and we struggle to be happy because we’re comparing ourselves to where they are and where we are.

But the reality is we have no idea what their lives are actually like. When it comes to the people we’re idealizing, there is always more going on behind the scenes. On social media all we see is the highlight reels of others’ lives – the cute couple photos, expensive vacations, professional accomplishments – all the happy moments. The bottom line: All of our lives are complicated. It’s a mistake to envy anyone.

When I have a weak moment and start to worry about the future, I remind myself to trust the timing of life. I make a conscious effort not to compare my life to anyone else’s and remind myself that I’m not supposed to be anywhere other than where I am now.

Reflecting on my life experiences up until now, I’ve been pretty surprised by my own journey. Things have fallen into place in ways I couldn’t have predicted, but the bottom line is everything worked out better than if I had planned it. The challenges all turned out to be blessings in disguise, but at the time, I just didn’t know it. As with anything in life, perspective is everything (take it from someone who makes a living overanalyzing).

So, when you start to stress and overthink, remind yourself that right now you are exactly where you are supposed to be. Start getting excited about what’s coming next.

It’s Okay If You Don’t Have It All Figured Out

Kaitlin Vogel

From covering health and wellness content to neuroscience to relationships and dating advice, I’m committed to creating content that matters. My goal is for readers to walk away feeling empowered and motivated – whether it’s to pursue their dream job, strengthen the connection with their partner, or follow mindfulness strategies to relieve stress and anxiety.

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APA Reference
Vogel, K. (2018). It’s Okay If You Don’t Have It All Figured Out. Psych Central. Retrieved on August 14, 2020, from


Last updated: 21 Mar 2018
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