LOS ANGELES - JAN 14:  Chris Soules at the ABC TCA Winter 2015 aWe first met Chris Soules on the 10th season of The Bachelorette when he was vying for the affections of Andi Dorfman. He made it all the way to third place and became a fan favorite. It was no surprise, therefore, that he was chosen to be the next Bachelor. Viewers were hopeful that the sensitive farmer would find love but, unfortunately, things didn’t work out in the end.

When it came down to it, Soules had two women left – Whitney Bischoff and Becca Tilley. It seemed like the chemistry and natural fit was stronger with Becca but her own hesitation (compounded by the fact that she admitted to never having been in love) and need to take things slow made her a poor fit for the rapid schedule of the show.

In the end, Soules picked Bischoff who regularly exclaimed that she was more than ready to get married and start a family. In fact, viewers sometimes commented on the fact that she almost seemed desperate. It felt like he picked the contestant who would agree to get married after knowing each other for such a short time, just to satisfy the producers of the show and, maybe, his mother.

After The Bachelor was over, Soules was invited to compete on Dancing with the Stars and there were loud rumblings about the fact that Bischoff seemed jealous of his dance partner. Further, they appeared to be having relationship problems. They downplayed the rumors but, just about nine months ago, they ended their engagement. Now Soules is talking about what went wrong and he’s making it more personal than you might expect.

The 34-year-old told People: “I’m hopeful for love but when you go through a breakup, you get stung a little bit and you pull back. There are times I wonder if I’m meant to be single. But I’m hopeful I can eventually find that person.”

Indeed, many people seem to feel similarly after a relationship ends. It’s easy to wonder, after several failed attempts at love, whether we are the problem. While it’s important to self-reflect and be introspective, it’s also essential that we aren’t too hard on ourselves. Learning from bad decisions or our romantic pasts can help us grow but dwelling on our mistakes can be counterproductive.

“I’m taking a break,” says Soules. “I’m focusing on me, putting my head down and working really hard. I’ve been sort of neglecting things that are really important to me.” It sounds like he’s got the right idea. It’s better to take a step back, regain equilibrium and evaluate priorities than get stuck in dysfunctional patterns.

Currently, Soules’ former love interest, Becca Tilley, is competing for Ben Higgins’ heart on The Bachelor. It was disappointing to fans from Soules’ season since many assumed that, after his breakup with Bischoff, he and Tilley could pick up where they left off.

He addressed the situation, saying: “A lot of people asked about us getting back together. She’s a great girl and I hope the best for her, but for me, that chapter in my life is closed. I think it’s best for me to move on, have a fresh start and find love a different way. I’d like to date someone who doesn’t know who I am!”

After all of his appearances on reality shows, it will difficult for him to find someone who hasn’t seen his face on television before. All the same, we hope Chris Soules finds what he’s looking for!