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John Mayer on Insecurity, Anxiety, and (Lots of) Sex

Confession: I used to not really like John Mayer.

I mean, I liked him – back during the Room for Squares and Heavier Things eras. And Continuum was pretty good. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get enough of “Clarity” – it’s just one of those songs that plucks at my neurons, you know? – and his cover of Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin'” is just fantastic.

Okay, basically I liked John Mayer right up until the moment I thought he broke Jennifer Aniston’s heart. I love her, and just want her to be happy. I know I don’t actually know her, and I know I don’t actually know what happened between them, but, whatever. I’m only human.

And my heart just goes out to her for all this unlucky in love business.

Anyway, when Psychology Today‘s Mikhail Lyubansky suggested his readers check out Playboy‘s recent interview with Mayer, I almost didn’t. It looked long and really, at that point, I still didn’t like John Mayer.

But I read it. I figured I needed something to do while I scarfed down lunch, anyway, so I read it.

And, kind of surprisingly, I think I like John Mayer again.

I didn’t really know what to expect when I pulled up the interview. Lyubansky briefly mentioned Mayer’s honesty during the interview, but his article was focused on Mayer’s discussion of his “hood pass” and use of The N Word — which the singer apparently caught a lot of slack for (on the second page of the interview, there’s a video of Mayer apologizing for much of what he discusses in the interview) — so I had no idea the majority of the interview was about insecurity, anxiety attacks, how he coped with his awkward teenage years, and how he copes with his awkward early 30s.

He even addresses his “douche bag” reputation, why he had that “too long” make-out session with Perez Hilton, and way more than you probably ever wanted to know about his sex life.

It’s not that I kind of, maybe like Mayer again because he talks about all that personal stuff. Anybody can tell their own secrets, after all. No, it’s more because of how he talks about all of it. They’re just words on a screen (or, paper, for you subscribers) for us, but to me, those words really do come across in a raw, genuinely honest way. Mayer sounds like someone who has a really firm grip on just how untogether he is and, as a fellow human who is quite often not so together herself, I appreciate that.

So, I second Lyubansky’s recommendation. Go read the interview. Even if you’re not a Mayer fan, and even if you’re not one of the many who read Playboy for the articles (*cough*), you might actually like it.

John Mayer on Insecurity, Anxiety, and (Lots of) Sex

Alicia Sparks

Alicia Sparks is a freelance writer and editor and the creator of, where she blogs to help new freelance writers get their quills in the pot, so to speak. Among animal rights, music, and physical wellness, her passions include mental health and advocacy. Here at Psych Central she works as Syndication Editor as well as authors Your Body, Your Mind, Unleash Your Creativity, and World of Psychology's weekly "Psychology Around the Net."

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APA Reference
Sparks, A. (2010). John Mayer on Insecurity, Anxiety, and (Lots of) Sex. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 10, 2020, from


Last updated: 11 Feb 2010
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