Archives for Family

Children and Teens

Archive: When Bullies are Home for the Holidays Too

"Beating the Bully" will be taking a holiday break until January. I'll be reposting some of the most popular articles from the past year until then. Happy holidays! 

I hope everyone reading in the United States had a happy and healthy Thanksgiving Holiday last week! When I thought about what to write after taking the holiday week off, I contemplated the numerous discussions I had both in and out of the consulting room regarding people's...
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Adults Bullying

When the Bullies are Home for the Holidays Too

I hope everyone reading in the United States had a happy and healthy Thanksgiving Holiday last week! When I thought about what to write after taking the holiday week off, I contemplated the numerous discussions I had both in and out of the consulting room regarding people's varied feelings about being with family during the holidays.

Families bring up powerful feelings and interpersonal dynamics. It's inevitable that old family dynamics are stirred...
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Bullying

Back to School and Back to Bullies? Not This Year!

The weeks following Labor Day bring the start of a new school year. For some students, there is a palpable excitement to return back to school, to see friends and swap summer vacation stories and meeting new teachers. For others though, the there is a fearful hope that maybe this year is the year things will be different.  Since bullying is in the forefront of public consciousness, let's work to make our...
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Bullying

Plastic Surgery to End Bullying?

You may have already heard about 14-year-old Nadia Ilse, who got plastic surgery after years of torment for having "elephant ears." Kids are cruel! Yet, as I read several different articles/blogs about Nadia, I wondered if the surgery circumvented an important process to unfold which could have lead to a "bully free" environment for in that community.

Dr. Vivian Diller eloquently stated her concerns, which I share, in the ABC...
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Bullying

Archive: Standing Up for Your Child at School

Hello All!

"Beating the Bully" will be taking a summer vacation and will be back blogging on August 13th! Until then I'll have some of the most read posts up for your enjoyment.
"It's in my job description as your mother to keep you safe," is how one mother in a group of parents I've been working with explains why she does what she does. The question that plagues parents is: is my child safe...
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Bullying

Archive: My Child is a Bully…Now What?

Hello All!

"Beating the Bully" will be taking a summer vacation and will be back blogging on August 13th! Until then I'll have some of the most read posts up for your enjoyment. Much of what is written about bullying focuses on what to do if your child is a victim. Little is written on what to do if your child is actually a bullyWhen parents find out their child has been bullying others, I...
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Bullying

Are We Overreacting To Bullying?

I was doing my daily internet research and came across this blog post by Cat Koehler, a mother who deconstructs the newfound attention towards bullying. Ms. Koehler astutely notes that never before have we put so much attention towards bullying. She goes on to suggest that due to this attention, we have become hyper-vigilant, labeling normative interpersonal conflict between children as bullying.

Ms. Koehler shares an incident involving her 9-year-old...
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Bullying

Choking Your Child’s Bully, Lowering Facebook’s Age Restrictions and Why This is a ‘Win’ for Cyberbullies

I came across some news reports of a Florida mother choking her daughter's Facebook bully. It seems that Debbie Piscitella was at her wits end! I cannot condone her behavior, but completely empathize with her feelings towards her daughter's bully.

Some news reports have quoted what the bully wrote and suffice to say I don't know any parent that wouldn't want to strike with a vengeance.

But as adults we don't.  And we shouldn't....
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Bullying

Standing Up for Your Child at School

"It's in my job description as your mother to keep you safe," is how one mother in a group of parents I've been working with explains why she does what she does. The question that plagues parents is: is my child safe when they aren't with me?* 

When a parent finds out that their child has been victimized by bullying, a myriad of emotions and questions arise:

Why is this happening to my...
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Bullying

Bullying Basics

With all the talk about bullying in the media (most recently spawned by the film 'Bully') do we really know what it is?

Violence Prevention Works defines bullying as aggressive behavior that is intentional and that involves an imbalance of power. Most often repeated over time. Bullying can manifest in physical violence (the most obvious acts of bullying), verbal attacks, and non-verbal behavior ( exclusion from activities, being the last student chosen for...
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