3 Things to Ask Yourself When You’re Just Not Bouncing Back

Do you ever wonder why you’re not bouncing back from things as fast as you usually do?

Maybe you’re facing a big stressor or perhaps it’s something so small that it usually wouldn’t bother you, but in either case, somehow you just aren’t as resilient as you have been in the past.

The tendency is to think, “I must be a real wimp; I usually am fine with this type of stress.”

You might be a wimp (although...


3 Ways to Tame Monstrous Problems

Take a look at this striking photo of a monster.

We see gigantic, multi-faceted eyes, leathery skin, and hairy, feeler-y things sticking out in the front.

Who knows what those feeler-y things might be hiding? Probably some hideous mouth with powerful, trap-like jaws.

It makes me shudder just looking at it.

Do you know what this scary monster is?

It’s a gnat.

One of those tiny little insects that we swat at impatiently as they flit around our...


Four Words That Can Get You Through Any Crisis

We face them every day.

Crises. Stressful events. Problems.

Sometimes they’re small like running out the door late for work only to find that the cat threw up on your shoe and you have to go back inside to change.

Sometimes they’re big like financial problems, illness, or loss of a loved one.

Whatever the situation, there are four words that can help you make it through better than any self-help book.

Before I...


5 Ways to Bounce Back from Everyday Stress


It happens to most of us every day. And most everyday stressors are things that we can handle fairly easily if we just remember a few simple strategies:

1. Engage your vagus nerve.

The vagus nerve is a cranial nerve that wanders throughout the body. Stimulation of the vagus nerve tends to slow your heart rate and create a calming response.

The easiest way to engage the vagus?

Take a deep breath.

Both moving your...


Are You Willing?

I’m often asked, “Why are some people more resilient than others?”

I don’t know the exact answer to this question (I’m not sure anyone does yet,) but I have a guess about one particular aspect of resilient people.


My partner often asks me to do things around the house that involve lifting heavy objects.

“You’re much stronger than I am,” she says in answer to my curiosity about why she would like me to...


Warning: Happiness May Be Bad for Your Health

If you’re searching for everlasting happiness, stop it.

It might be bad for you.

Here’s why:

A recent article in The Atlantic explored an innovative new study by Positivity author and researcher Barbara Fredrickson and her colleague, Steve Cole.

Frederickson and Cole noted that, when faced with adversity, our bodies tend to go into threat mode. This tends to increase the “activity of pro-inflammatory genes and decrease the activity of genes involved...


You Might Be In Trouble If You Don’t Know This One Thing About Your Mind

I want to let you in on something that no one talks about.

You don’t have to believe everything your mind says.

Those thoughts that come up and tell you how terrible you are? You don’t have to believe them.

That voice that says what you did was okay, but you can always do better? Take it with a grain of salt.

The constant, annoying, analytical thoughts that you can’t get out of your mind?...


How to Survive Emotional Quicksand

You've probably watched the typical hero-in-quicksand scene in an action movie. The hero (or maybe an expendable extra!) runs through the jungle and suddenly is knee-deep in soft, shifting sand and sinking quickly.

The harder he struggles, the faster he sinks.

What to do? The solution is much easier than our hero thinks.


The Best Grief Book of All Time

I know I’m going out on a limb proclaiming a book “The Best Grief Book of All Time,” but that’s exactly how I feel about Tear Soup.

Upon first glance, Tear Soup appears to be a children’s book. It is handsomely illustrated with beautiful, and somewhat whimsical, drawings.

And Tear Soup is for children. But it’s also for teenagers, adults, seniors, and anyone who has lost anything, not just someone.

The first page sums up the entire book:
“There once was an old and somewhat wise woman whom everyone called Grandy.

She just suffered a big loss in her life. Pops, her husband, suffered the same loss, but in his own way. This is the story of how Grandy faced her loss by setting out to make tear soup.”
Just what is tear soup?

It is the concoction that is made up of all your memories, feelings, and experiences you have while you grieve. Here, let’s see Grandy’s recipe for tear soup found on the inside cover of the book (with gratitude to authors Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen:)