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Tag archives for Abuse


Ode to a Paedo

You said you were the man,
The only man I could trust.

Then touched my young breasts,
while denying your lust.

So the game was on,
you'd screwed with my head.

Copped a feel every day,
while I lay in my bed.

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Narcissistic Hoover and Discard at Warp Speed

"Ah, this takes me back," Howard commented on The Big Bang Theory. "...I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love your new stuff, but once in a while it’s nice to hear the hits." And it's the "hits," the "classics," the basics of narcissism we're revisiting this month in Narcissism Meets Normalcy.

What I didn't expect was for Fate to put me through a hoover/discard scenario with a real-life narcissist over the weekend. It was amazing how fast it all happened! At...
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No More Incest!

Just when you think you've seen it all, heard it all, experienced it all, that's when you discover life can get sicker, more warped, more twisted, more disgusting than you ever imagined.

I knew my husband, Rhys, had been raped multiple times by his aunt when he was an innocent four-year-old boy. I knew his rapist had been raped by her father, Rhys' grandfather. I hoped the incest stopped there. It didn't.

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Is Jesus All You Need for Emotional Healing?

All my life I've watched people stand up in church and tearfully tell how all their problems were solved by inviting Jesus into their heart (a phrase not found in the Bible, btw.) And all my life, their claims bothered me. I just didn't buy it. No therapy. No counseling. No journaling. No learning. No soul searching. No recovery. Their testimonies implied that Jesus healed everything from pain from narcissistic abuse to addiction with absolutely no effort on their part, no...
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Alienated Fathers: Don’t you DARE Give Up!

'I had the plan, the place, the rope,' my husband, Rhys, told me. 'I was going to end it all. I'd been a loving father and a good provider. What I didn't realize is that my ex never intended to stay with me nor let me be a father to my children. I was merely a sperm donor to her. When she had the full quota of children, she took them away and sued me for every pound I made. I...
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What’s a Narcissist’s Punishment?

How Abusers Get Away with Their Behavior

People with strong narcissistic, psychopathic, or sociopathic tendencies, abusers, manipulators, and otherwise harmful people tend to hurt others. Sometimes they do it overtly, even proudly, and in other cases it’s covert or maybe even unconscious. Sometimes it’s well planned and calculated, while other times it’s careless and reactionary.

Sometimes these people are identified and are forced to accept the consequences of their wrongdoings, while other times they get away with...
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Things Abusers and Manipulators Say to Their Victims

People who have strong narcissistic tendencies and other toxic people are known for their manipulation tactics. Some of them are consciously cunning and deceiving. While others are more primitive and blunt in their disturbing behaviors.
Whatever the case may be, such people tend to project heavily, not take responsibility for their actions, blame others, and use gaslighting.
Here are some of the things abusers and toxic people say to...
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Narcissists Hate Seeing You Happy

People with strong narcissistic tendencies hate seeing others do well. There are several reasons for this, and we will explore some of them in this article.

First and foremost, true happiness comes from within. Narcissistic people are unable to feel genuine happiness because they severely, or even completely, lack a sense of genuine self.
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How Childhood Abuse Becomes Self-Abuse

All of us have probably acted against our own self-interest at some point in our lives. For some people, it’s feeling sick after eating a bag of candy or drinking too much, while for others it’s self-mutilation and mental self-erasure.

The concept of abuse is complicated. It’s simple on an abstract theoretical level: abuse is a type of behavior that is harmful. But it’s much more complicated on a psychoemotional level because people tend to justify or...
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Trauma Of Domestic Violence: 7 Ways It Alters Your Life

Photo Credit: Alexas Fotos

Do you know someone who is (or have you been) the victim of domestic violence in some form (, as a child, a parent, a spouse, etc)? Do you remember what happened during the abuse? Domestic violence is more prevalent than most people believe. In fact, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports that about 20 people, per minute,  are being physically abused in...
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Child & Adolescent Mental Health

Traumatic Bonding: 9 Signs You Are Bonded To The Abuser

Photo Credit: Global Panorama

Abuse. What does that word mean to you? After giving a presentation at a conference, in 2014, of parents and families who have lived through years of abuse, I recognized that not many people understood the full definition of abuse. Some families either minimized the term (made the term sound better than it should sound) or magnified the term (made it sound much worse than...
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Mindfulness: An Unexpected Antidote to Workplace Stress

Across settings and disciplines, there is increasing evidence of workplace stress. In her New York Times article reporting on the lack of civility in the workplace, Christine Porath opens with the line,“Mean bosses at work could have killed my father.”

According to her research, intermittent stressors like experiencing or witnessing uncivil incidents or even replaying one in your head elevate stress hormones and a host of health problems.
Porah reports that bosses often...
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