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Tag archives for Abuse

Coping Strategies

When Trauma was King: 3 Ways to Miss It


When I'm treating patients for depression and anxiety I of course take a thorough history. What is often missed is long-ago trauma that has been repressed and buried. Traumatic memories can re-surfaces in the middle phases of therapy when trust is well-established. No news here. But the news is that trauma lives in the body (The Body Keeps the Score) so when we go back to revisit it, the therapist must go slow to...
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Anger

Addiction and Emotional Abuse

“The truth is that the few times he was physical with me were tiny blips on a long timeline of subtle manipulation, public humiliation, controlling behavior and gaslighting.” So writes Leigh Stein of her abusive boyfriend in her Washington Post essay, He Didn’t Hit Me. It Was Still Abuse.

Despite the deeply painful impact of emotional abuse, many people don’t grasp its significance. There are no bruises and broken bones, so does it really “count”?

Our answer: it certainly does. Emotional abuse is real, and...
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Anger

Addiction and Verbal Abuse

“You’re stupid. You’re an idiot.”

“What’s wrong with you? You’re crazy!”

“You’re worthless, you’re nothing.”

“You should never have been born.”

“You don’t shape up, I’m gonna kill you.”

All of these words and phrases constitute verbal abuse. That’s why just seeing them on a computer screen can cause...
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General

Narcissists Hate Seeing You Happy


People with strong narcissistic tendencies hate seeing others do well. There are several reasons for this, and we will explore some of them in this article.

First and foremost, true happiness comes from within. Narcissistic people are unable to feel genuine happiness because they severely, or even completely, lack a sense of genuine self.
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Anger

A Paedophile’s Son Speaks Out

When I wrote When Females Rape Males, I couldn't have foreseen the impact it would have. Thousands read it. It trended on PsychCentral's homepage. Many men commented, revealing (perhaps for the first time) their own heart-breaking story of rape at the hands of a woman and its far-reaching impact on their life.

But something else shocking happened too. My husband's uncle, Brynmor1, contacted him for the first time in thirty years. Somehow, he had found the article about Rhys' rape at the...
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Abusive

How Can We Honor Narcissistic Parents???

In the first article, Honoring Narcissistic Parents!?!, we discussed exactly what honor means and, more importantly, what it does not mean ( obeying them blindly.) Please read it before diving into this article; it sets the foundation.

In this article, we'll figure out exactly how we can still honor narcissistic parents without compromising our mental health nor breaking "No Contact."
What Others Are Saying
When I mentioned the topic of "honoring parents" on Facebook, many of my children-of-narcissists friends instantly expressed interest. It's a...
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addiction

How Childhood Abuse Becomes Self-Abuse


All of us have probably acted against our own self-interest at some point in our lives. For some people, it’s feeling sick after eating a bag of candy or drinking too much, while for others it’s self-mutilation and mental self-erasure.

The concept of abuse is complicated. It’s simple on an abstract theoretical level: abuse is a type of behavior that is harmful. But it’s much more complicated on a psychoemotional level because people tend to justify or...
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