13 thoughts on “Chores: When Simple Tasks Become Overwhemling

  • February 10, 2011 at 11:29 am

    I have been going through a moderate episode for 18 months now. It appears to the world that I am fine but the reality is that I’m not. I function but I don’t. I understand not being able to accomplish simple tasks. I have learned, through my many experiences how to function on a certain level but there were many times when we lived off of frozen meals. And my husband washes the floor, and if he didn’t – well, the dirt will still be there tomorrow – I try not to work myself up over it.
    At a mindfulness workshop I learned that if I am having a tough time it’s okay. I am learning to be okay with my tougher moments, trying not to fight it but just allowing it to be and this has helped. I will hear in my brain even through my tears “I’m having such a hard time, but that’s okay.”

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  • February 10, 2011 at 12:41 pm

    MY 30 YR Old son has the same Bipolar!and i so understand what your going through!doesnt seem like this should be a task??but it is?..he does not have 4 children,u still just little things like taking the trash out or if he has to go job hunting??its like the end of the world is coming.so yes i do understand.and thank God your husband is a good one!!and i must add ..talk to your children early about this.as i found it to be very helpful on all ends of the Bipolar cycle!!peace and great karma in your journey..

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  • February 10, 2011 at 1:05 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing this ..I know it takes courage to be this honest and I admire you greatly for doing this . I have Rapid Cycle Bipolar too , diagnosed only 2 years ago . This period in your life that you are describing is exactly how my life is …. exactly. I look forward to reading more from you . xxx

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  • February 10, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    Thank you for sharing. You are not alone in these struggles to overcome depression in order to get the smallest and mundane of chores done. I know if I could just get something done it would help me feel a little better, even if only for a little while. Chin up, and hand hubby a sponge from time to time!

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  • February 10, 2011 at 5:24 pm

    welcome to psych central, beth! parenting is a challenge at the best of times, and when we are not feeling our best, it is all we can do just to put one foot in front of the other. so be kind and gentle with yourself, and there is no shame that a bath is a big accomplishment. it IS a big accomplishment. one day at a time, hon!!

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  • February 10, 2011 at 10:40 pm

    Hi Beth,
    I want to say that you have my utmost respect and admiration.
    My mother is bi polar but declined to get treatment, had no support and was non-compliant with medication. I will always love her and know she loves me even though there is nothing I could do to help or support as a kid. I no longer know where she is as an adult and while I have fond memories of her on the good days and the bad days as a kid, I’m delighted to see your story out there for others to hear. It gives me hope and reminds me of my mom. Where ever she is now, I hope she gets to read stuff like this.
    Ciaran

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  • February 11, 2011 at 8:03 am

    Thank you all for your support! There are a lot of people who do not understand what it is like coping with mental illness while raising children. Others just need someone to relate to. I don’t mind being open and honest if I can help others to understand that none of us are alone! I look forward to a long and happy blogging experience here on Psych Central.

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    • May 26, 2017 at 4:12 am

      Hello I used to suffer from depression and I have days when I feel a little deeprested but for the most part I met a man name Jesus and he healed me I cried out to God and he heard my cry not saying it isn’t hard to Deal with but if you take it one day at a time and trust in the Lord he will stay faithful in our weakness we find strength in Jesus… Those that don’t believe in God just never had an encounter with him never knew him. When all else fails try crying out to Jesus… once you open your heart and feel his presence you will never again deny Gods existence… Jesus is the answer… You are loved and made perfect in Christ….

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  • February 24, 2011 at 7:21 am

    I completely understand! MY husband will leave for work and ask if I could do a load of laundry that day…my response…”I can try”…it really is a difficult thing to understand if you’re not living it!

    “Today I buckled down and decided to go ahead and do some laundry and mop. Some people just really don’t understand the mental preparation (and the many cups of coffee!) required to tackle such a simple task. It’s not very hard to do and it doesn’t take a whole lot of time, but it sure does feel extremely overwhelming just thinking about getting up and getting it done.”

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  • October 14, 2013 at 10:04 pm

    i have 2 girls and i am a single mom. for the while i thought that i had it together you know the chores and getting them to and from school but now i cry constantly i ask GOD what is going on in my life because i can’t even get them to school or get them to the bath. my place is a literal mess and i don’t know what to do all i want to do is stay in my room all day and cry it hurts so much i want to be the best mom to my girls and i cannot even relate to them emotionally most of the time i feel like i’m alone and no one to turn to that makes it worse please tell me something just anything please its hard really hard and my girls deserve soo much better

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    • April 21, 2017 at 1:14 pm

      Did you find relief? I live the reality you describe. Does it end?

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  • May 22, 2017 at 1:14 pm

    This is so me. I did a load of towels last week. Guess what? They’re still in the dryer needing to be folded. The kitchen and bathroom floors need mopping. I’d say it’s all of 3 feet of flooring that needs to be mopped. There are some pots and a few dishes in the sink that need to be done. I want to change the sheets on my bed as well. Just looking at the small pile of dishes in the sink makes me feel overwhelmed. The floors have needing to be mopped for weeks. It’s all of a 5 minute chore.

    Unfortunately my hubby is not as understanding. Right now he’s the only one working because I can’t work due to my anxiety. He feels that if he has to work his butt off, the least I can do is keep the house clean. Lately he’s been nit picking over everything. So I need to take a deep breath and attempt to get something started. Wish I had friends that lived near me. It would be so much easier to have someone around to at least get my ass out of bed.

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  • May 13, 2019 at 12:05 am

    So much of what u have told here I can so relate to right now but I dont have support like u do…u have an amazing husband….I do love my partner but when it comes to my depression, he just switches off…I’ll say no more…just wish I had someone to talk to that understands me somewhat anyway, someone that goes through similar torture like I do…no battle is worse th a n the daily battle against ur own mind…this is worst bout of depression yet for me, feel so alone…and smothered by this…need help, need support but just have nobody close by to turn to. Much love to uand respect for getting thru urs little by little…well done…I’m just stuck, getting nowhere…hate myself so much, feel a complete useless failure. Wish I was a bit stronger as u seem, well done u.x 😢

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