bipolar momRecovery from such a major surgery has not been easy. I had my follow up this past Monday and things look okay…sort of.

I am having some problems with healing, it hurts and it’s yucky. It’s crazy they talk about risks, but they don’t mention how gross and painful it can be! I’m hanging in there though, as best as I can.

The depression has gotten much better, I am able to do a little more every day. I still can’t lift the baby but at least I can hold him on the couch. He’s been having sleeping problems the past week or so, we’ve been up until 1 am with him – I’m exhausted.

My husband and I are fighting over money again, I knew it would only be a matter of time. He likes to save money, as much as possible, and sometimes it irritates me because saving is not always possible in life when you have kids. It’s very hard to get that through to him, but whatever.

Now I have restless body, great. We aren’t sure if it’s medication induced or just my body sucking again. It’s really tough going to sleep. The doc gave me medicine that is supposed to help, but I really don’t want to add another pill to my ever growing daily pill regiment.

The kids have been crazy over the past couple of days, and when I say crazy I mean crazy enough to drive me up every wall. I wish I could get them to quit fighting, more now than ever. It seems impossible.

My husband is starting his planning on going out every weekend since I am ‘healing’ okay. I really wish he’d quit that but it doesn’t look like he will any time soon. I wouldn’t mind him going out with his buddies so much if it weren’t every Saturday, and if he didn’t always come home after 3am. It’s about compromise, only he isn’t so willing to give at all.

I feel sad, I have so much to do around here with dirty floors and bathrooms, and I can’t get up and do it. I am so limited in what I can do because of the surgical complications I am dealing with, they are seriously slowing me down. I cant wait to get better and get back into the swing of things.

I can’t wait to be able to pick up my baby. I know he must miss that. It was our thing, snuggling close next to his crib at night before bed. He is protesting now, refusing to sleep at night, because I can’t hold him.

I can’t wait to get my life back.

Mom photo available from Shutterstock