5 thoughts on “When people can’t deal with your mental illness

  • March 6, 2015 at 7:21 pm

    Thank you for writing this piece! It was brilliant! I have faced similar situations as you have. I have become more brave as a result and very choosy about who I decide to let into my life. I will never be ashamed of having bipolar and anxiety. It is others that have to learn to accept me, all of me.

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  • March 6, 2015 at 9:33 pm

    I am so very sorry you had a therapist terminate with you that way. I had one do basically the same thing, and it was absolutely devastating. Getting attached to someone and trusting her and then having her completely let me down in such a cruel way is something I hope never to have to deal with again. My current therapist is awesome and would never do anything like that, but it took a lot longer for me to trust her because of the horrible experience I had before her. I am Borderline and not Bipolar, but I understand far too well the crappy ways many people (including “professionals”) react to mental illness diagnoses.

    Please keep up the great writing. I love reading your blog!

    Connie

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  • March 13, 2015 at 11:52 am

    I’m blown away by the denial and people who think they know more than my therapist and doctor. I don’t know how to respond to comments like “but you don’t really have it,” “everyone gets just a bit depressed,” or “I knew a guy who was bi-polar, he was out of his mind. He couldn’t function, not like you.” I guess I am supposed be complimented that they don’t think i’m ‘crazy’ like all those mentally ill people. Maybe they don’t want to deal with the fact that someone they work with, trust, like, or are related to is mentally ill. My mother (I’d bet the farm she is bipolar, too) thinks this is a fad.

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  • March 14, 2015 at 11:10 pm

    I’m bipolar, and I have lost jobs because of it.

    I’m very high functioning, have won awards, and so forth, and am well known in my field.

    I would like to know why p-docs urge us to come forward with our problem at work.

    It’s happened to me twice, now, when I lived in D.C., and now, while living in Washington state.

    I had a great Government job in D.C., was one of the team leads for a major project. I then became fatigued, and my p-doctor at the time put me on FMLA. She had me email my manager, who was high up in the chain, that I was very sick. When I got back from FMLA, I found myself getting fired. It was a horrible process, and, meanwhile, my p-doctor had me sign release after release stating I would not sue her for what happened to my career.

    Then, I got a great contract to hire with a fortune 500 company. Once again, everything was going well. I was getting great feedback on my work, management was going to hire me, and night duty was introduced as one of the conditions of employment. I should have just quit. However, my doctor urged me to come forward, not with the entire diagnosis, but with enough to explain why I could not do the work. When I asked for some sort of accomodation, I got fired three days later.

    My coworkers were shocked. They had not a clue that I was disabled, and they thought I was the last person who should have been fired. I should not have been entrusted with telling my manager that I needed some sort of accommodation. I probably said too much. My manager had had a bad experience with another coworker who had a nervous breakdown, so he panicked.

    The head of the placement firm has been telling ex-coworkers of mine that, due to a health reason, I could not do night duty. So now I’m probably going to have to sue, yet one more time, to get my references straightened out.

    I think it’s negligent of doctors to tell their patients to come forward. Sure, it works for Senators and other famous people, but it does not serve me. So why do these doctors tell us to come forward at work?

    By the way, few people know I’m bipolar. Those that don’t know have not a clue that I have a disability. They think I’m completely normal.

    It just seems like a vicious cycle.

    Sue

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  • March 20, 2015 at 1:40 am

    I am going through this right now. one by one i am losing my friends. calls are not returned. my father passed away and then my little dog of thirteen yrs left this earth. i heard from a cousin i have not seen in 40 years, bless her and a single friend sent a message to FB. the pain of loss is agonizing. i feel as if i am grieving dying and the living. i am now isolating myself from the world staring into the abyss – no light in sight, thinking how death would comfort me. i also had a therapist “terminate” me because of a suicide attempt. he said i was too depressed, he couldn’t help. what he should have said was “I am an incompetent fraud, a common thief. Thanks for the cash” i hate to sound like i am feeling sorry for myself, i’m not. just very lonely…

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