My grandma is going through some repeating heart palpitations and shortness of breath. She has had a couple different x-rays and ultrasounds done and so far so good. She will have a procedure done this month where they put her under and shock her heart in hopes of getting it back to the right rhythm. Scary. Or maybe it is simply being 81. Maybe it is just getting older.
I have arthritis. I am 35 and I already have arthritis. My mom blames all the dancing and cheerleading I did in my teens. Maybe so. Or maybe it is that I am getting older.
Sometimes people at work get frustrated with me for not knowing how to do certain things at the coffee shop. I want to tell them about all the things I have done, all the places I have gone, all the many supervisory positions I have worked, but I don’t. I smile, say “Thanks for your help.” Maybe 10 years ago I would have acted more defiantly. Or maybe I am just getting older.
My diagnosis of bipolar 1 disorder was, at first, life altering. It was scary. It was horrible. It was the end of my life. But now, nearly 8 years later, I can see it for what it is – an illness. Just something else I have to learn to live with. Maybe that is wisdom or maybe it is just getting older.
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