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When The Dark Clouds Come

dark cloudsI am having a rough day. Had a rough night last night, tonight too. I want you to know these moments, days, weeks, months will come.

I feel so heavy. My thoughts are dark. I just want to sleep, to escape. This is Depression, my old bastard of a friend. He makes me yell. He makes me irritated. He makes me throw things. I don’t like him very much, no, strike that, I hate him.

I am trying to use my tools. Right now I am listening to soothing music. I tried breathing exercises. I tried calling friends and family, but no one is available. I told my boyfriend I needed him and was told to “calm down” and “I just walked in the door. Geez.” I ended that short conversation because obviously he was going to be of no help.

I am also feeling a little paranoid. So far the Geodon has kept me from that, but tonight it doesn’t seem to be helping.

I just need someone to tell me it will get better. Tomorrow is a new day, and most likely I will be a different Elaina J – a much brighter, lighter version. But for tonight, it is hard to wait ’til morning.

 

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When The Dark Clouds Come

Elaina J. Martin


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APA Reference
Martin, E. (2015). When The Dark Clouds Come. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 21, 2019, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/being-bipolar/2015/10/27/when-the-dark-clouds-come/

 

Last updated: 27 Oct 2015
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 27 Oct 2015
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.