For every blessing in my bipolar journey, there seems to be a cost. My anxiety is pretty much under control lately. (Yay!) I take anxiety meds three times a day. I can function. I can drive my car. But I am tired most of the time.
I take an atypical antipsychotic called Saphris. It is my wonder drug. It was the first thing that really seemed to get my moods and symptoms under control. For years I took two 10mg tablets at bedtime. Recently, my psychiatrist has asked that I take one at night and one in the morning as that is the way it is prescribed to be taken. Easier said than done. Although not a sedative, it has sedating properties and makes me exhausted. So now I set an alarm for 6 or 7 in the morning (depending on how early I go to bed), wake up, put the tablet in my mouth to dissolve, and go back to sleep. I’ve learned I need about 4 hours to get over the fatigue. I’m not lazy. I am medicated.
I wish I didn’t need these meds. I wish I could just function like a “normal” person, but the fact is that I do need them and they are working and as long as they are working, I will continue to take them. I rather be cool, calm, and collected than anxious or manic any day so I deal with the fatigue.
*I know there are some of you out there that read this blog that do not believe in taking medication and I respect your decision. Please be respectful of mine.
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