I have been mentally ill – maybe forever. As far back as junior high I can remember dark thoughts permeating the light ones. It is nothing to be ashamed of, it is chemical composition. As much as I don’t want these thoughts they are as much a part of me as my green/brown eyes and curly hair. They just ARE.
As I have mentioned before having a support system is paramount. You need people in your corner. You need your own cheerleaders because sometimes getting out of bed is an insurmountable feat. You need someone to vent to, someone to TRY to understand how it feels to be mentally ill. This life is hard as Hell.
Recently my best friend and I have passed emails back and forth about not being there, about trying to be there – about life. Jesus, life is hard.
All I know is that your support system is ever evolving. Add a new member from your support group. Drop that old high school friend who is always comparing your lives. Give. Take. It is an evolution.
I am not even trying to say I am dropping the “best friend.” I am simply saying that you have to be open to new supportive people in your world.
I have met a local lady who “gets it.” It is so nice to have coffee with someone who has been on the inside of a psych ward – it is like a secret handshake. I have even found a couple of online friends that I trust. I have never met them face to face, but I know they “get” me.
Search and reach out to people who understand you. They will help you. They will keep you safe.
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