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You Are Still Lovable

heartsWhen I was first diagnosed with bipolar 1, I took it pretty hard. My whole world had just been flipped upside down. A week prior I had been a Style Editor for a major website in California and then, there I was, sitting across from a psychiatrist with my mother at my side in Oklahoma being asked a bunch of questions that all boiled down to an accurate diagnosis – bipolar disorder.

I didn’t know much about the illness so, as I am apt to do, I researched. I read ferociously books on the subject. I joined a support group for people with bipolar disorder. I went to therapy.

I read a lot of bad things – like suicide rates and co-morbid conditions – things I had no idea I was at risk for.

And mostly I felt ashamed, as though my mental illness was my fault and I had to keep it a secret because who would ever love a sick girl?

When I was very sick, I was vulnerable and it was this vulnerability that allowed me to let people in.

What I’ve learned on my journey being beautifully bipolar is that I am still lovable. There have been people to love me through hospitalizations, bouts of depression, and flights of mania. You see, it is part of the package and it isn’t a part I need to be embarrassed about.

You are still lovable. Mental illness does not exclude you from love, just as a cancer patient isn’t excluded from love because he or she is sick. You have an illness of the mind and it isn’t your fault, and it isn’t a dirty secret. Be open to love – from friends, family, partners – because you deserve it.


Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at


You Are Still Lovable

Elaina J. Martin

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APA Reference
Martin, E. (2015). You Are Still Lovable. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 24, 2019, from


Last updated: 7 Feb 2015
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 7 Feb 2015
Published on All rights reserved.