I laid in bed until an un-Godly hour today. I took my meds at 6 am and again at 10. Fed, watered, and let the dogs out and back in again. Then I retired to the bed with the heating pad to soothe my aching leg. It felt good to drift in and out of consciousness, to know my two dogs were near, to know that despite the stormy weather outside – I was safe.
I had a hard time getting motivated. I didn’t eat until 2:30 pm. Tuna fish on toast and a quarter of an avocado. Strange, but needed.
I seriously debated whether or not I could go another day without a shower, just throw on a “Virginia is for Lovers” ball cap and a hoodie. But because I couldn’t decide what to do, I showered. I figured the rest would come to me…And it did. I styled my hair, put on a cute outfit, put on the diamond necklace I got from my boyfriend for my last birthday. I felt better, more alive.
I understand how hard it is sometimes just to commit to a shower. I know how it feels when all you want to do is lie in bed. But you have to try. Take the shower and go back to bed if you have to, but make an effort, as Herculean as it might seem.
No one said Being Beautifully Bipolar was easy.
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