Conflict arises from differences. It occurs whenever people disagree over their perceptions, feelings, or opinions.
When we do not understand how to effectively deal with anger, we often choose coping methods that are harmful.
Many of my clients seek therapy because they cannot accept that some things in life cannot be changed:”I wish I hadn’t been abused in childhood”; “I wish my spouse was different”; “I wish these things weren’t happening to me.” When you desire to control the uncontrollable, you set yourself up for disappointment and possible depression.
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room’s only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.
A stream, from a far-off mountain, passed down through the countryside, until it at last reached the sands of the desert. Just as it had crossed every other barrier, the stream tried to cross the desert, but the stream found that as fast as it ran into the sand, its waters disappeared.