6 thoughts on “Amazingly Simple yet Accurate Tool for Making Yes or No Decisions

  • June 7, 2010 at 4:38 pm

    I used this almost exact solution for years, however it’s use irritated some that were close to me as they did not understand the thought process. It has lead to some interesting stories and life changes in my life.

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  • June 8, 2010 at 7:49 am

    I found this insightful but I can think of a possible scenario (or two) where it may not be helpful.

    Sometimes, children of dysfunctional families are taught not to trust their “gut instinct” because what they see as a child is often quashed by their parents as “not so” (ie: dad is not drunk, he’s just tired).

    So, how does one know that they are trusting their “gut feeling” when most of their life they have never trusted how they felt anyway? The answer (my counter-argument) is that a child of a dysfunctional family must “learn” to trust their gut instinct, this takes time. Me being a child of an alcoholic, I can say that to trust my gut is very hard to do (but I am slowly learning).

    My concern as to where this exercise may fall down is when “fear” comes into play. How do I know whether I am feeling “fear” when the coin falls or my “gut instinct”? Fear drives many people, my fear may over-rule my gut instinct.

    For now I think I will try this exercise for not so big decisions 🙂

    Thanks for the article.

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  • June 9, 2010 at 11:55 am

    Is the decision you feel best about always the right decision to make?

    Sometimes, it certainly isn’t.

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  • June 9, 2010 at 3:50 pm

    Love the comments! It is interesting, we go into our minds so often to analyze which really gets us out of our hearts. Immediately when the people flipped their coins they had rationale for why it wasn’t true, didn’t work, etc. but in the end they said – yes, that is the right decision!

    Callista, I think if a decision isn’t right it won’t make you feel instinctively great. It isn’t about what you feel best about, it is how you feel when you know that is your final answer / decision. If it isn’t the right one for you it will show up in your feelings.

    For a very easy example, should I go get ice cream or go to the gym? Of course ice cream is better, but if I have been trying to get in shape for 13 weeks and it is my big goal to stay healthy, if I really FEEL myself going to indulge in ice cream and flip the coin if it says yes my heart will tell me if that is the ‘truth’ about how I feel.

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  • June 9, 2010 at 3:57 pm

    Lisa,

    I completely hear you – I was one of those kids! This process is exactly what counteracts that fear / gets you around it. That is why I think it is so brilliant.

    Fear comes in when you start rationalizing, so often times our decisions get lost because of how we were trained. When really, we know all along what the decision should but can’t get to it because of mind chatter about what other people will think, is it right vs. wrong, etc.

    You really have to get into the feelings / heart when you do the exercise, but by flipping the coin your heart does something immediately – it either feels good or bad, and then you quickly go to your head and rationalize. That is why it is so important you get the first quick feeling as that is what clears away the mind junk and gets to the heart of the matter.

    It would be interesting to do research on the chart that I put up in a previous blog to this one – and see if the answers come up the same / different. I hope you do try it out and share the results, we would love to hear! I also hear you about starting small, sometimes it is good to test the waters!

    Thanks for the response.

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  • June 10, 2010 at 1:29 pm

    I can see this being applicable to many clients I work with; whether or not they have a diagnosis of ADHD. I definitely plan to share it with some clients.

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