13 thoughts on “Don’t Touch Me There

  • September 3, 2012 at 11:18 am

    Wow Zoe – this hit home in so many ways. I am so hypersensitive, skin issues (dealing with systemic poison ivy right now) – I can’t decorate the Yule tree without breaking out, can’t sit on the grass. And the sense of smell is so acute, too, I become nauseated by the slightest “off” smell. (But my eyes are pretty bad. The doc told me I have General Anxiety disorder. (GAD)but with my performance activity and teaching, I am living in the moment. If I am not doing anything I fret and fret away…ADD?

    • September 4, 2012 at 4:32 pm

      I’m so sorry to hear about the poison ivy, Laurie!

      As for whether or not you have ADHD, I would suggest you start with this online questionnaire, it’s the one my doctor uses as part of his diagnosis of ADHD. If your test results indicate it, I would pursue a consultation with your family physician to see if she or he can diagnose for ADHD or if they can make a referral.

      The Jasper / Goldberg Adult ADD Questionnaire (you can fill it out online; it’s confidential)

      All the best!

  • September 4, 2012 at 8:46 am

    Good article,but why does it only focus on women? Guys can have that stuff too.

    • September 4, 2012 at 4:29 pm

      Hi Joe.

      The article addresses both genders, as well as making specific references to women in some cases (e.g. I only know women with ADHD who dislike underwire & underwear, not men).

      I’ve been researching and writing a book based on my experiences as a woman with ADHD, and have focused on women with ADHD on numerous other projects, so that’s probably why the article sounds skewed, sorry about that. However, it is my understanding that more women than men continue to be diagnosed with mood disorders, however I don’t have the statistics to back that up. Also, I am more aware of women who have been inadertently diagnosed with bi-polar disorder instead of ADHD, but I would guess the same occurs to men. I would be interested in hearing any research you have on the topic.

      And yes, guys can “have that stuff;” I refer to them specifically elsewhere, but as I said, my research at the moment focuses on women and ADHD, and as such, I’ve interested many more women than men with the condition.

      I hope you still find the post valuable.


  • September 4, 2012 at 12:27 pm

    Once again, thank you for validation. (If only I could get your blogs to the people in my world, my boss for instance!) If only he would learn to behave in my realm – sigh. I love and hate this side of my world…..when I was young my family said ” shes just a hypochondriac,” of course because the couldn’t see my tummy ache it probably wasn’t real. Now that I’m beginning to understand there are a lot of other “crazy people” in the world I feel so much more “normal” (whatever normal is)!

    I am highly sensitive – it makes some aspects of my “career” challenging – yet rewarding. If only I could be The Wizard in places other than my own mind…

    Peace and blessings to you – keep the good news coming!

    • September 4, 2012 at 4:29 pm

      You’re welcome, Wizard!

      I’m glad you found the piece affirming. And you’re right: you’re definitely not alone!

      Take care,

  • September 5, 2012 at 2:13 pm

    Dear Miss Zoe:

    I am so happy to learn other people, esp. women, who have a hard time wearing underwear. I am ecstatic.

    Ever since I was a child, I didn’t let the feel of wearing under-garments. It wasn’t just the fabric that made me itch. It felt very constricting, so much so it was hard to concentrate whatever task was on handed. It made it difficult to pay attention in school. Since going without your undies as a child was taboo, I had to suffer through it.

    When I reached puberty and had to start wearing a bra, I suffered even more. It didn’t help coming of age in the late 60’s when bra burning was the thing to do because that is when I decided for myself to stop wearing those items. The only times I would wear them was under duress or out of necessity; like wearing a white blouse. Even though it was only my close family members & a few friends who knew, I still had to explain and could not get anyone to understand WHY I refused to wear underwear.

    I have endured, for the past 40 years, a lot of cynicism, criticism and have been the butt [no pun intended] of many jokes. I have, also, been told how gross it was ya-da, ya-da, ya-da.

    It is so nice to know that it isn’t because I am still an old hippie or sick in head because I prefer to go without. I was only DX w/ ADD in my early 50’s and a lot of this stuff is making more sense, at least, to me. My family still doesn’t quite get it. But now, I can just smile.

    Also, just want to add that I, too, am very sensitive to odors, esp. perfumes whether made out of man-made chemicals or natural ingredients. I have ended up many of times in the ER because I’d get migraine headaches so bad as the result of someone else’s perfume or someone was burning scented candles. I have a laundry list of smells that give me a headache, nausea, blurred vision, etc. It is not pleasant.

    I had many headaches even as a child. I now realize it was because of my hyper-sensitive orifice glands. I have a hard time doing things, such as go to the theater or any enclosed setting, because I can’t control how much perfume someone within a 2 or 3 row range was going to wear. Granted, it also depends on how much the offender was wearing; whether they took a bath in it as some Grandma’s do or lightly, dabbed it on. Well, enough said. You get the point.

    I enjoyed the article. Melrose

    • September 5, 2012 at 2:26 pm


      What a delightful comment! Thank you so much for taking the time to share your experiences. It’s amazing what we discover about ourselves, even into our 50’s and beyond, isn’t it?

      And the feeling of self-knowledge and self-acceptance goes such a long way to inner peace and happiness! I hear this in your words and I’m so, so happy for you.

      Your comment will only add to that feeling in others who read, and resonate with yours, mine, and the experiences of all of those who have taken the time to add their two cents’ worth.

      Thank you so much!

      Here’s to headache-free outings!

      Be well,

  • September 5, 2012 at 11:27 pm

    Interesting post – I’m wondering if the author has heard of Dabrowski’s overexcitabilities (cited in literature regarding gifted students) as the traits of ADHD and giftedness often overlap/co-exist?

    • September 6, 2012 at 5:42 pm

      Why no, I haven’t. Can you send a reference? That would be appreciated.

      • September 6, 2012 at 11:25 pm

        Here’s a few readily accessible works:

        Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults: ADHD, Bipolar, Ocd, Asperger’s, Depression, and Other Disorders by James T. Webb, Edward R. Amend, Nadia E. Webb and Jean Goerss

        Living With Intensity: Understanding the Sensitivity, Excitability, and the Emotional Development of Gifted Children, Adolescents, and Adults [Paperback]
        Susan Daniels (Editor), Michael M. Piechowski (Editor)


        And, of course, the one that I would most recommend 🙂 …


        Enjoy – I think you’ll find this interesting!

      • September 7, 2012 at 8:29 am

        Thanks so much, CarrieLynn.
        I’ll check them out.

        Have a great weekend!


  • December 13, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    Wonderfully interesting piece of insight, it’s so lovely to connect to other super sensitive people-it’s like ‘no worries, us too’ Lolz

    Here’s an interesting thought for you, granted I was ‘diagnosed’ with dissociation tendencies, but when I feel possible “pulses” of energy that cause sensitive outbursts, it’s possible for me to block them to channel in other directions, like art or feeding my brain.

    Though i am still working on timing, because the dissociation makes picking up on social nuances more difficult. Also, more so(?), if the time limit is exceeded i burst even worse. A really funny way to look at it is trying to hold in a secret, when it doesn’t matter if i tell my book-and this person won’t let me do either, so *explode* and its out.

    Thank you for writing such fantastic pieces on super sensitivity, gods of love, we sure do need them. 😀


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