15 thoughts on “Hypersensitive and Frazzled by Facebook

  • May 31, 2014 at 11:19 pm

    Facebook – for saying who we (think we) are

    and saving that in a timeline so one day who knows will find deep spiritual guidance from our meaningless mediocrity

    me, i just like flickr with all my cameras automatically saving every picture i take, as i take them

    i can go back and see what my life was like without having to endure the silliness of mo old words

    and anyone who wants to really know who i am can just see me through the world i captured and when and where

    so much easier and it achieves much the same goal

    i expect that soon all cameras will see what it is they are photographing and record that information along with the picture

    and banks of computer farms will analyse and scrutinize and postulate and try and sell people stuff

    but what the hell – let them

    it just makes us all wiser to the insidiousness of it all

    p

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  • May 31, 2014 at 11:38 pm

    It’s a good article. Facebook is draining. Not even real time conversation…..just like a scrapbook…who wants their pics to be reduced to a postage stamp? Stinging message sent to me recently about an objection to something written totally crossed the boundary and implied said person owned their space and I was intruding. No one owns any intellectual property posted on facebook…..we are owned. It’s silly, not much use, really.

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  • June 4, 2014 at 11:09 am

    I took a break from Facebook and deactivated my account about 3 months ago, and I haven’t had any real desire to get back on since. My life is SO much more calmer and relaxed without it. I do miss a few things, but the benefits of not being on Facebook completely outweigh any positives.

    Take a break from Facebook and see what changes (positive and/or negative) in your life you notice!
    You can just deactivate your account and if you decide to go back on, you can simply reactivate it.

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  • June 4, 2014 at 11:30 am

    Oy, GET OVER YOURSELF!

    It is embarrassing to even READ what you wrote. OMG my little feelings are so hurt because somebody did not like my post! For shame. Grow a pair already.

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  • June 4, 2014 at 1:42 pm

    Of all the various social media outlets, Facebook is probably the worst for hypersensitive people. Within the past 24 hours, someone referred to me as “dumb” on a public forum just for expressing an opinion that was in conflict with his. Being unfriended is, indeed, stinging, but something that has happened to me that I regard as far worse is when people you know ignore your friend requests. For those and other reasons, Facebook is at the very bottom of my list when it comes to social media outlets. I much prefer Twitter, Tumblr, Quora and Reddit.

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  • June 4, 2014 at 1:59 pm

    Facebook to me is: Where people post endless photos of themselves 40 years ago. Where everyone thinks their opinion is the only one in the universe. Where “friends” are collected to make people feel important and popular. (Like high school for adults). Most of the “friends” people have wouldn’t take 5 minutes to call you or send you a personal e-mail if you were dying. I rarely get on and then only on the page of one true friend who lives 1200 miles away. I read another article who called it “Fakebook” and I thought how appropriate. Loved this article as well.

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  • June 4, 2014 at 2:04 pm

    I feel the same way. I quit Facebook after 2 days. I’m also an HSP, and not only do I not want my pic resized, I don’t want it online at all. I use a drawing on all my posts everywhere. There are enough assaults on our online privacy without this sadly popular site. We might as well go back to high school.

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    • June 4, 2014 at 3:01 pm

      Thanks Jayne, and everyone, for all your comments. Quite an interesting dialogue you’ve got going here and I agree; for HSPs there is a special reaction to the goings-on of Facebook and elsewhere. I note that one commenter reacted as I suspected, very negatively but if I had to guess, I’d guess that they don’t have the hypersensitive nature that some do – a quality, by the way, which is genetically inherent in approximately 15% of the population.

      I meant my post to reflect subtle response, not over-the-top, cry-myself-to-sleep reactions, and I was fascinated when I detected what was going on. It’s all a part of the quest to “know thyself.” While I was afraid this post would also expose me to ridicule (it did, and I was) in the desire to write honestly and not hold back, I was willing to put it out there.

      Thanks to you Jayne, and everyone else who wrote in with their input on how Facebook has affected them, it was well worth putting aside any personal feelings of vulnerability as the post has engendered an honest, open sharing of what it’s like for some of us and for that – I appreciate you all!

      Take care!
      Z.

      Reply
  • June 4, 2014 at 3:34 pm

    Super insightful article, Zoe. FB has become a weird environment where people rant, share too much personal information, and post far too many selfies, which says nothing more than, “look at me, look at me!”

    From my perspective, FB provides a stage for people to bare too much of themselves in a majority of those using it. People have become obsessed with social media and smart phones in general…it’s sad not being able to have a discussion or dinner with someone without them looking at their phone and/or communicating with someone else via text. Social media has brought us to a place that too easily disregards the person you’re with without recognizing you’re acting this way.

    It’s a strange, weird world we live in!

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    • June 4, 2014 at 4:29 pm

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Gretchen. I agree about spending social time with others when their faces are planted in their smart phones. When I think of the challenges I had with social skills because of ADHD, and how hard-fought they have come after diagnosis, I wonder if the next generation will have even more challenges inflicted by this technology? Are we losing our humanity by disengaging with living, breathing, human beings – by not learning about facial expressions, subtle nuances of conversation, etc.?

      It’s a strange, weird new world indeed.

      Take care,
      Z.

      Reply
  • June 4, 2014 at 4:54 pm

    I am currently in recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder and am a HSP. I never use my personal Facebook account. I only use my Facebook Page for BPD. I would rather use FB to help people than to keep up with all the petty stuff that goes on. Please check out my Page here: https://www.facebook.com/MakeBPDStigmaFree

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  • June 4, 2014 at 9:15 pm

    I’m a hypersensitive person, too. So are most of my FB friends or they’re gone. If people post things that are shocking or cause me grief, they are unfriended. I feel no loyalty to anyone who sends a friends request. If I don’t know them personally, I write them a message and say so, also saying I don’t approve friends requests from people I don’t know or who don’t share an obvious common interest. I don’t join groups that scapegoat or attack, or I leave them if they turn on each other.

    Through FB I’ve reconnected with people who played important roles in my life–childhood and adulthood. They are precious to me. I like knowing what’s happening in their lives. I share what I want to and keep the tender parts of myself to myself and those with whom I relate face to face. I don’t find FB so troubling.

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  • June 5, 2014 at 10:27 am

    I shut my Facebook account down over 6 months ago. Along with all the pitfalls and negatives you mentioned, it’s important that everyone remembers that anything you put out there, even if private…may not be so private. I’ve had someone stalking me for over 11 years. It’s the wife of a guy i dated after college. I haven’t spoke to him since we broke up but his wife or maybe him too won’t leave me alone. I’ve never met her, never have spoken to her, but she is determined to find where I live and I’m not sure what else she is capable of or what she wants. Over the last 11 years she has made up many fake profiles in order to try and friend myself, family and friends. She went as far as sending flowers to me at my boyfriends’ parents house for my birthday this year. That was the last straw. Since the florist wouldn’t tell me who sent the flowers I hired a lawyer to supenea the florist. Once I found out it was her, I had the lawyer send her and her husband a letter stating if either of them continued to harass myself or anyone close to me I would file charges of harassment and cyber stalking. Because of all of this i have shut down all social media sites I belonged too. Sometimes I do miss being able to see how family and friends are. I’ve lived in many different places and it’s convenient to keep in touch with everyone that way. But I’ve also realized…the “old fashion” way of either picking up a phone and call or make time to visit people is always such a better way to stay in touch.

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    • July 27, 2014 at 6:54 pm

      HI. I have also had issues with people being fake on FB. I also shut down all my social media subscriptions about a year ago. But then I realized that if I did that, then that person has control, and I was NOT willing to have that. SO I got back on and I haven’t had an issue since. I hope you well and hope that you can one day feel comfortable enough to get back on your social media outlets.

      Reply
  • July 6, 2015 at 3:58 pm

    Hi Zoe,

    My wife and I run a Delphi forum called Mental Health Kaleidoscope, which is a support group with private folders, and where there is no judgment or flaming. Come check it out. By the way, my wife, Hummingbird, just published an ebook called “Funny… You Don’t Look Bipolar.”

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