11 thoughts on “Spanking Hurts ADHD Kids More Than You Think, Part II

    • April 12, 2013 at 12:35 am

      Thank you, Terry.
      Take care,
      Zoë

      Reply
  • April 12, 2013 at 10:07 am

    Stop Beating Students with Disabilities in Schools

    In the 2006 – 2007 school year, nearly quarter of a million school children were subjected to corporal punishment in public schools. “Impairing Education, a report released by the ACLU and Human Rights Watch, finds that students with disabilities — who have a right to appropriate, inclusive educational programs that give them the opportunity to thrive — are nonetheless subjected to this violent discipline at disproportionately high rates.

    Corporal punishment — from paddling to beating to throwing children into walls or floors — is routine in public schools in many parts of the United States. “Impairing Education” documents many such cases. No student should be subjected to these abusive forms of discipline, but students with disabilities, who already face extra challenges, can be particularly vulnerable to physical or psychological harm from these punishments.

    April is “National Child Abuse Prevention and Awareness Month” as well as “National Autism Awareness Month”, yet as of April 2013 there has been No Re-Introduction of proposed Federal Bill H.R. 3027 “The Ending Corporal Punishment in Schools Act”, Cost $0 due to lack of Federal Lawmaker Sponsors, yet Federal Law Prohibits Corporal Punishment in ALL U.S. Prisons! dont hit students dot com

    Reply
    • April 12, 2013 at 10:24 am

      Julie,

      Thank you so much for your comment and the information you provided. As a Canadian, I realize my research and post provided details mostly from my country, and the details you’ve shared from our southern neighbors is much appreciated.

      We do, after all, share the same beating hearts – hearts that are breaking all around North America and beyond.

      Let’s start valuing human dignity, and human spirit above “well-behaved” kids. Children – all children – can flourish, but like the seedlings in my greenhouse they need the right nourishment to grow.

      btw – I had no idea April was “National Child Abuse Prevention and Awareness Month.” Clearly, I’m already aware. Given my own childhood, I’ve been quite well-aware for a good long while now. I’m glad I’ve found my voice, and I pray that my contribution, however modest, will help others to be more aware and to find their own voices to speak out for change and justice.

      Thanks again for adding your voice, Julie.

      Take care,

      Zoë

      Reply
  • April 12, 2013 at 11:12 am

    What a pity that the Bible and certain Christian denominations (especially fundamentalist/ evenagelical denominations) have contributed to the practice of corporal punishment for children. Reading Proverbs(3.11, 20.30) one finds many examples where it is strongly recommended. We should not underestimate the force of this doctrine on society today although this is rapidly changing and we are becoming more enlightened. But those who believe in the inerrancy of the Bible will disagree and may well advocate spanking a child.

    Reply
    • April 12, 2013 at 12:54 pm

      Hi Rob.

      Thanks for taking the time for weighing in. The comments so far have really added to the conversation, and I hope to hear many more perspectives to give a fuller picture of this complicated, or at least controversial, topic.

      As a Canadian who works very closely on a daily basis with my American friends and colleagues (through my blog, various magazine editors, and with my American publisher, New Harbinger Publications, etc.), it’s been quite a learning curve over the years regarding not just the similarities between our nations, but also the differences. This is a long-winded way of saying I hadn’t taken your points into consideration as the religious right in our country is not as much in the forefront as it is south of the border. Yet.

      As I mentioned to a previous reader, the research and resources I cited (including my own oft-spanked bum) were all Canadian.

      You’ve introduced an important aspect, and one which I’m sure will raise the bar on dialogue. I’d be fascinated to hear from a representative of any of the groups you’re referring to, to try to better understand their perspective. (I seem to have misplaced my bible.)

      To expand on your point, it would be interesting to take the pulse of other religious and spiritual groups and viewpoints on the matter. For example, I’ve found the community which loosely refers to itself as “pagan” to (generally speaking) espouse and practice some of the most humane, compassionate, balanced and evolved child-rearing I’ve ever witnessed. For example, there is a great emphasis from birth for children to be well-educated in their own dignity, self-worth, intrinsic power (power in a creative, constructive and productive way), and sense of self as divine beings who have a great responsibility towards themselves and all others, regardless of age, race, belief systems, or otherwise. Respect of self and others is paramount and can be palpably felt when amongst these communities.

      One wonders what other groups think of corporal punishment? I suspect that my Buddhist community would take a dim view of it as well. I’d love to hear other perspectives, so if anyone reading this can enlighten us, it would be most welcome (but let’s remember to do so respectfully).

      As for me, I’m pretty convinced the physical punishments I received have made me a more compassionate person in so far as I will continue to work to eradicate this form of “discipline” so that others are spared.

      Thanks again for taking the time to share your view.

      Cheers,
      Zoë

      Reply
  • April 17, 2013 at 7:12 am

    I accidentally happened on to your article..Good. I forwarded it to a woman who spanks her son with add. What’s fascinating is that she professes to have devoted her life to her children but does this…saying she is teaching him to respect women. Teaching him to not be violent by spanking him and in front of his sister, who could use a smack or two. Lol further humiliating and shaming him. She refuses to look at the absurdity of her thinking.

    Reply
    • April 17, 2013 at 4:31 pm

      Hi Patricia.

      Thanks for taking the time to read my blog and share your thoughts.

      I’m glad you found the piece helpful, and it’s great that you’re trying to help others. Please remember though that people don’t change until they are ready, no matter how much information they’re provided with. All we can do is encourage and enlighten and then we have to let go.

      Cheers,
      Zoë

      Reply
  • July 25, 2013 at 12:34 am

    Thank you so much for putting this out there. I wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD until recently. I’m 25 years old. I remember getting in trouble for stuff that I honestly could not help. I really could not remember to do certain things for school or keep up with my stuff. I was called lazy and fat by my grandparents who raised me. I was made fun of at school for for being raised by my grandparents…

    My grandparents spanked me for everything. Because that was the only punishment they could really use on me since they didn’t let me go out or have friends or anything like that. I’m just now beginning to realize that I don’t even know myself. I honestly believe that I am in the stages of getting to know my own personality that most people experience from the age of 16. Sometimes I feel incredibly resentful, but I know intellectually this won’t get me anywhere.

    Reply
    • July 30, 2013 at 10:28 pm

      Oh April, your story is really heartbreaking; but I’m so glad you are finding out about yourself now. You are still young! I am twice your age and still feel (mostly) like a teenager. And quite honestly, a lot of the time, that’s not so bad. But I agree it is very important to get to know yourself as well as you possibly can, so you can begin to take good care of yourself and invite the things that make you happy and feed your passion (once you’ve identified it / them) into your life so that you can enjoy it to the fullest.

      I do understand that resentment is a fruitless emotion – but it’s still important to acknowledge – rather than deny it. I think of my emotions, all of them, the nice ones and the not-so-great ones, as things I get to feel deeply – and by feeling them deeply I can let them move through me and they’re gone (eventually). I think the only way to truly let them go is to first respect and acknowledge them – not feed them (especially the negative ones), but to just give them a nod, observe, feel, then bid them adieu!

      I do wish you well on your healing journey, for it does sound like some emotional healing is happening and needs to happen. You can do it!

      Feel free to comment and drop by any time; I hope reading about others’ similar experiences is validating and nurturing for you.

      Cheers,
      Zoë

      Reply
 

Join the Conversation!

We invite you to share your thoughts and tell us what you think in this public forum. Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines. A first name or pseudonym is required and will be displayed with your comment. Your email address is also required, but will be kept private. (Please note that we use gravatars here, which are tied to your email address.) A website/blog/twitter address is optional.

Leave a Reply to April Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *