Zoë Driven by DistractionMost of us are familiar with the classic ADHD “subtypes”:

– inattentive
– hyperactive-impulsive
– combined subtype

ADHD is a syndrome

Some feel that these subtypes are not always helpful in describing adult ADHD. Current researchers, such as Dr. Margaret Weiss, see ADHD as a syndrome, or collection of symptoms. Each of us lucky ADHDers has our own, special, combination of symptoms, and the severity of each of these symptoms varies.

Aw, what the heck! We’re gonna play with subtypes, anyway!

That being said, I’ve been observing adult ADHDers in both my personal and professional life (as a writer, blogger, researcher, teacher, etc.) for over four years now. It fascinates me how different we are. How one adult ADHDer, for example, can be great at cooking desserts, while the rest of us end up with – you got it – Pomegranate Fiasco.

From my rigorous, keen, and unscientific research, I feel that several valid additional subtypes can be identified. I’ll be submitting my research for inclusion in the long-anticipated DSM V. I’ll expect the Pulitzer to arrive shortly thereafter.

And you, dear readers, are privileged herein to take the first peek into my shrewd, leading-edge adult ADHD analysis. You might even find yourself represented amongst these…


ADHD w/gastronomical deficits

I think we’ve pretty much covered this one. For review, please check my blog post Cooking with ADHD – Spicey. And…Dangerous! Don’t forget to read the comments section as many of you with this subtype responded (thank you all).

ADHD/rock star-delusional subtype

It’s well-known that ADHDers have more car accidents than non-ADHDers. I would hypothesize that a high percentage of those accidents are perpetrated by those suffering from this subtype. Let me explain: this subtype has flavors of the “inattentive” subtype, in that, for example, while driving along the highway, the ADHDer in question will be blaring Hendrix, Zeppelin, Joan Jett, or whatever loud rock music of their choice, while intensely fantasizing about being the drummer, singer, or lead guitar player in the band. Or so other ADHDers tell me… (ah-hem) (she says, guiltily clearing her throat…)

This extreme form of distracted fantasy naturally leads the sufferer to be a tad careless while behind the wheel. Wheel? Is that a wheel? I thought it was an electric bass! Aaaaaaaahhhh…. [insert loud crash sound here]

ADHD/cougar subtype

We’re the hyperactive women who are constantly mistaken as being 10-15 years younger than we are. We’re bubbly, energetic, we date much younger men – we have to – guys our own age can’t keep up with us.

ADHD/doormat subtype

Nancy Ratey brought this subtype to my attention when I interviewed her for The Disorganized Mind – Yours, Mine, Nancy’s: Meet Nancy A. Ratey. Nancy, an ADHD Coach, notes that a lot of us ADHD women are  easily taken advantage of. Through her work, and her own life as an ADHDer, she’s noticed that we’re trusting, vulnerable, and often lack boundaries.

Not only do we buy a lot of snake oil, but we’re the ones burning out from heading up 50 committees. With our impulsivity and unbridled enthusiasm, we often say “yes,” when we should be saying “no.”

ADHD/self-medicating subtype

You know the type:  “Yeah, I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD; but I prefer to self-medicate with coffee, cigarettes, and weed, if it’s all the same to you.” I have lots of dear, male ADHD friends with this subtype. These guys are lethal to be around if you have a propensity for addiction yourself. BEWARE!

ADHD/standup comedian subtype

You can spot this subtype a mile away. We’re loud, animated, sharp, witty and funny. Unfortunately, this subtype may also have the highest percentage of desperately poor ADHDers. So next time you meet an incredibly funny coffee-slinger, give them the secret handshake that says you recognize their frustrated-standup-comedian ADHD subtype.

If you’re the doormat type, you can offer to wipe the tables for them; if you’re the self-medicating subtype, slip ’em a joint. They could probably use it.

ADHD/dysgraphia subtype

Apparently 68% of us ADHDers also have dysgraphia, or, very simply stated, poor handwriting (statistic from Dr. Timothy Bilkey, public lecture, 2010). Let’s just say it’s a good thing I type, not hand-write, this blog.

Do YOU know of any ADHD subtypes?

Perhaps you’re aware of an ADHD subtype. If so, by all means, send it in so I can steal…er…submit it along with the others here, for DSM V approval!

Follow ChickADD44 on Twitter