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Don’t Assume You Know Me


having adhd
You think you can see inside my mind?

You think I forgot that thing because I don’t care, right?

Don’t assume you know me.

You think I don’t remember your name because I don’t find you interesting.

But that isn’t the most likely reason I can’t remember your name.

In fact it’s more likely that I was so focused on the interesting aspects of you that the label that is your name just went in one ear and out the other.

You think I can’t get things done because I can’t concentrate.

Well, guess what?

I can concentrate, but this boring stuff you think I should do is not interesting enough to keep my attention, even if it does have to get done.

There are things that are as interesting as a circus to me and just because they aren’t right here and right now does not mean they are not available for thought in my quick and agile mind.

That’s right!

I said agile. My mind does tricks that others can only dream of. Or maybe they can’t even do that, I don’t know. I can’t see inside their heads any more than they can see inside mine.

But I can tell you how mine works if you care to listen.

Out of sight may be out of mind for the neuro-typical, but that just tells me they maybe don’t have the ability to imagine the way I do.

3D quadraphonic surround imagination …

… sometimes with panic-vision. Yes, that’s also true. I’m not always just thinking about riding bikes and building nuclear reactors in coffee cans, I spend a lot of time worrying.

And you may think that I’m worrying about the things you think I get wrong, but I worry more about the things I may be missing.

Every day I say things that may have been said without a full appreciation of the context of the moment. Every day I do things and discover afterwards that there were additional aspects to the situation I did not consider.

Often …

In fact, very often those things don’t matter. Sometimes they do and there’s trouble.

But the weird thing is that neither the ones that didn’t matter, nor the ones that did, are the ones that worry me.

I worry because I am convinced that there were things I missed that did matter, that everyone saw, everyone noticed, everyone knew about, everyone but me. And I worry that I am still unaware. That the missed thing is hiding in plain sight and I will be fired, called out, marched through town to the public stockade and humiliated for my complete ignorance.

Did you know that about me?

I’m betting you thought I was just thinking about cartoons when I was supposed to be doing this mind numbing thing at work, didn’t you?

Well, okay, you’re partly right.

I was doing that too.

I told you my mind was agile.

Don’t Assume You Know Me


Kelly Babcock

I was born in the city of Toronto in 1959, but moved when I was in my fourth year of life. I was raised and educated in a rural setting, growing up in a manner I like to refer to as free range. I live on the traditional lands of the Chippewas of Nawash in an area where my family history stretches back 6 or 7 generations and my First Nations friend's families go back hundreds of generations. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 50 and have been both struggling with the new reality and using my discoveries to make my life better. I am a freelance writer and I write two blogs here at Psych Central, one about living with ADHD and one that is a daily positive affirmation that acts as an example of finding the good in as much of my life as I possibly can.

Find out more about me on my website: writeofway.

email me at ADHD Man


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APA Reference
Babcock, K. (2020). Don’t Assume You Know Me. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 20, 2020, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-man/2020/07/dont-assume-you-know-me/

 

Last updated: 22 Jul 2020
Statement of review: Psych Central does not review the content that appears in our blog network (blogs.psychcentral.com) prior to publication. All opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the author alone, and do not reflect the views of the editorial staff or management of Psych Central. Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.