Recent events in my world have caused me to turn my attention toward anxiety and the manifestation of it in our lives.
People with ADHD have a tendency to replay situations in their minds and it’s usually situations that cause them to feel anxious.
Like having a chipped tooth that you can’t stop running your tongue over, just to assure yourself that it actually is chipped, our minds seem to forget momentarily that we said or did that unbelievably stupid thing and then remember it and replay it in a state of horror.
Sometimes we try to fix it in our mind, what we should have said, what we should have done, where we should have been instead …
We always return to remembering that we have done or said “The Thing” and the realization that we now must have plastic surgery and find someone who can forge new identification papers and relocate us for the $37.14 in our current savings.
Anxiety replay is a horror show in the mind with us as the star.
And then there’s rehearsal
Rehearsal is the thing we do where we are so in fear of some real or potential upcoming situation that we go over and over what we will say and do, and we can’t stop that either.
The anxiety involved is either that the situation is one that could go very wrong by its own momentum, or that we could make it go wrong.
My first memories of rehearsal were from my childhood when I wanted people to like me and was certain that if I could just practice in my head the perfect social interactions with others I’d be so cool and calm when I interacted with my peers and others that I’d be in with the cool crowd for the rest of my life.
To this day when I meet people who I think are cool things go mostly like:
Me: (quickly and clumsily) “Parsnips. Insurance agent. Oh … you didn’t ask a question. I’m sorry, my cat is on fire. his name is Alice. No, I have no cat. Must. Leave. Now. Antarctica I think.” (running away)
Them: ” …. o…. kay?”
And here we are
Anxiety is normal in life. But it isn’t supposed to be constant. And it isn’t supposed to occur when you’re not in danger.
If you have ongoing anxiety, you might want to talk to your mental health care provider. For one thing, it might be your ADHD medication. It might not be, but that did happen to me.
You see …
You also might just have generalized anxiety because you’ve found your way into that area and need a little guidance to get yourself out.
And your mental health care provider can help you locate yourself and from there give you directions that you can follow to find your way back to being reasonably afraid of speeding automobiles and world threatening pandemics.
Because, you should really be the life of the party, you with your spontaneous sense of humor and your radically fun approach to life.
You and your ADHD should be finding your way forward to the future, not stuck worrying about the past.