If you’re contemplating a relationship with a person with ADHD, you might be worried about them being bored.
Why? Well, because if they are bored, that means they might wander off in distracted fashion as we are wont to do.
And that means, once they have wandered off, you’re left with not much of a relationship. right?
So how do you fix that?
I’m going to try to help you out.
I’m going to see if I can’t come up with some things you might try as couples activities that will keep your intended’s attention.
Well, for starters, why not?
B) I have some insight into these things.
And 3, I’m a bit of a romantic, so if you’re intending to strike up a romance with someone who has ADHD, I’d like to see that succeed.
So, what to do?
There are many activities that people with ADHD can enjoy.
The trick is that they have to have an easily seen reward, or they have to be cumulatively interesting.
The easily seen reward
The easily seen reward thing is something where when the activity is done there is a benefit to it. It does not have to be some benevolent thing, you don’t have to benefit the world at large, philanthropy need not be your target, though that is something you might want to try working into the mix.
Consider a project that is simple yet exciting and that ends up with you sharing a resultant activity or having some achievement in common. My partner and I too ka ring making course, her idea, and it was a blast. We now wear matching sterling silver rings each one made by the other.
Another fun and less structured project is to make something together that you can find plans for online. Say a spud gun or something. You get to go shopping at the hardware store, work on cutting and assembling parts together, and you may end up with a functioning tuber rocket launcher as a party conversation piece.
The cumulatively interesting
This one is more tricky to pin down. The point is that the constraints must be simple, but the variations should be close to infinite, or at least appear to be. An example of such an activity is Sudoku, where there are a few simple rules, but the end result is a puzzle that cannot be solved simply by putting numbers randomly in squares. Sudoku, sadly, is not a couples activity unless you have two identical puzzles and you attempt to do them in competition, and that isn’t really a dating activity.
One of the things I do that is a lot of fun is Curling. And I here must confess that my partner got me started in this as well. There are a lot more rules to this game than there are to Sudoku, but you don’t need to know them all, you only need to know some of them. And while Curling is traditionally a game played by a team of four there is a variation called mixed doubles where you and your date could engage in playing against an opposing team of two.
There are possibly some things you might want to avoid, and some you might not even want to mention. Axe throwing comes to mind. No one should willingly go axe throwing with someone who is known to become distracted. If you do go axe throwing with someone who has ADHD and you hear them utter those famous ADHD words, “Hey everybody, watch this!” … don’t look, just take cover.
I hope this discussion has helped you come up with some plans, I wish you good luck, and I encourage you to move forward with your project. Relationships with those of us who have ADHD can be fun and exciting, truly worth your endeavors.