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I Need A Break!


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I woke up today feeling … a bit off.

I mean, nothing I could put my finger on, just … like things weren’t really the way they should be.

Yes, I know we’re in the middle of a pandemic that is the biggest crisis humanity has known in many decades. But I’m kind of down with that, it seems that we are moving forward, mostly, as a global unit.

Now before I go any further in that regard, I need to remind you all that I live in Canada and we seem to have things relatively under control which is to say there are people dying here but our numbers are within projected limits.

What???

Yeah, that sounded harsh even as I was writing it. But I can’t take it back, it’s the truth and it’s what I meant to say.

And denial isn’t going to get us anywhere.

Fine! Be that way!

But the thing I was saying is, something else seems off. Or maybe what I should say is that something has always been off.

All my life I’ve flirted with social acceptance. I’ve struggled and worked at being considered worthy of acquaintance with my peers.

It wasn’t until ten years or so ago that I realized I wasn’t actually among my peers, I was different.

Then …

It took a few more years for me to find my way into a few online places where my people were actually gathering virtually and then I was among my peers.

But when I shut down the computer, I was back in the world of the Zombie apocalypse, people were happy to point out how different I was.

And having had 50 years of that already, I was quite at home with that.

Lucky me.

I had the world I had grown up in, and the new world I had found where my people were hangin’ out.

I had it all.

And with both worlds at my disposal, I was able to finally make my life work reasonably well. I had the real world as a sounding board for how normal was supposed to be and be dealt with, and I had my virtual world where I could ask questions about the way I was and get a dozen responses saying, “Oh, yeah, me too!” and we’d all talk about our luck in finding our tribe.

Enter COVID-19

Now, I have my virtual world, and that’s about it. I mean, I know a lot of real world people in real life and real time that I also know in the virtual world, but somehow it just isn’t the same as when they are in my presence.

Perhaps it’s because I can’t see them rolling their eyes at my corny jokes, or see them smirk at me when I get distracted.

And the thing is, I need that grounding to keep me up to date on how the real world works.

So, I need a break. I need a break from all this social distancing in real life. If someone could just drive up to the end of my lane and smirk at me and roll their eyes when I start to talk, I’d be ever so grateful.

What do you say?

I Need A Break!


Kelly Babcock

I was born in the city of Toronto in 1959, but moved when I was in my fourth year of life. I was raised and educated in a rural setting, growing up in a manner I like to refer to as free range. I live on the traditional lands of the Chippewas of Nawash in an area where my family history stretches back 6 or 7 generations and my First Nations friend's families go back hundreds of generations. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 50 and have been both struggling with the new reality and using my discoveries to make my life better. I am a freelance writer and I write two blogs here at Psych Central, one about living with ADHD and one that is a daily positive affirmation that acts as an example of finding the good in as much of my life as I possibly can.

Find out more about me on my website: writeofway.

email me at ADHD Man


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APA Reference
Babcock, K. (2020). I Need A Break!. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 23, 2020, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-man/2020/04/i-need-a-break/

 

Last updated: 14 Apr 2020
Statement of review: Psych Central does not review the content that appears in our blog network (blogs.psychcentral.com) prior to publication. All opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the author alone, and do not reflect the views of the editorial staff or management of Psych Central. Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.