Does this happen to you?
I’m feeling a bit under the weather today.
I’ve had some kind of dry cough the last few days and it’s making my head ache and my chest hurt.
I am probably coming down with something.
I’m even feeling a slight bit fevered.
But this is a mental health site
Yep. And I’m talking physical health there, aren’t I.
But here’s the thing I’m getting at, as I’ve said a thousand times, stress exacerbates ADHD.
And oddly enough, physical stress is one of those stresses that does that very thing.
At least …
I find that to be the case.
When I’m not well, I can be feeling less stress emotionally, I can willingly just kick back and relax and give myself time to heal. It’s not always the case, but there’s less emotional stress coming from being ill, and since I have an excuse for not performing to my optimum capacity, I’m off the hook to some extent for getting things done.
And that’s fine
But I still find myself wandering all over the place, at least mentally. I’m down the rabbit hole on social media and even get lost while trying to make my way back to what I should be doing.
There is less of a feeling of stress, but the physical manifestation, the pain in my chest, the headache, the tiredness, they seem to play a role.
When I catch myself wandering, I do get a pang of anxiety that is emotionally stressful, but a) I was already wandering, and b) it goes away pretty quickly when I remember that I’m not well.
So I’m hard pressed to think that I’m adding emotional stress, the kind that is usually affiliated with increased ADHD symptoms, when I’m ill. And in fact, I think i could make a good case for feeling less emotional stress when I’m sick by virtue of having an excuse as mentioned up above.
No one else expects me to perform perfectly when I’m ill, why should I?
I’m here, in my office, doing my usual work. I have some laundry on the go, I intend to do some cleaning and a bit of cooking, and continue with my work here in my reclining office chair.
But I know that today, I’m also going to wander a bit more than usual … and I’m okay with that.
I’ll try not to let it get out of hand. I’ll try to finish what I start and what I have on my list for today, but I’m not going to berate myself for any failures.
I’m sick. I’m already under enough stress.
Now, whither shall I wander … ?