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Things You Think Will Help

seeing red
I’m steamed!

This blog is written to help people who have ADHD and to help those who want to understand more about ADHD.

But today I’m going to list off some things that don’t help those of us with this insidious disorder, things that may mislead those who believe they would like to understand more about it.

I’m going to tell you things I’ve heard people say that have caused me to write posts like yesterday’s.

And since I’m still harping on the cause of yesterday’s post, I might as well just start with that for you here.

It was this …

Why would you not give yourself a few extra minutes…just in case?” was a comment made by someone who clearly doesn’t understand ADHD.

If the commentor did understand they would know that we who have ADHD do not have an endless well of extra minutes to give ourselves. In fact, like getting into debt with a payday loan company, we owe more minutes already than we likely have left to our lives.

And since we never know when the need for the few extra minutes might materialize, if we did have those extra minutes, we’d have to give ourselves a few extra for everything we attempt to do. And since we do so many things in our lives we’d soon be left standing with an overabundance of extra minutes and that would lead us to doing other things that would distract us and soon we’d be behind again.

What else?

Yeah, okay, I’ve harped on that one long enough, but don’t expect me to forget it. It is still angering me.

The next one I’ve heard was from the parent who refused to accept her child’s diagnosis of ADHD because her son was “clearly of above average intelligence.” This woman told me this after I told her that I had ADHD, which, although she likely didn’t mean the inference, meant that she felt that ADHD was indicated by a lack of intelligence, which meant she was suggesting to me that I was of below average intelligence.

I couldn’t fault her for not realizing what she was saying to me, she was clearly not smart enough to deduce that she was insulting me, but then, I don’t think she had ADHD so it’s likely that her mind just didn’t work quickly enough to keep up with the conversation we were having … oooooh, that was a little insulting, wasn’t it? Sorry.

The truth is …

People with ADHD span the intelligence spectrum. Furthermore there is anecdotal evidence that our mean and our average are above the mean and average marks set by the general population. I’m not sure how to explain this to the general population so that they can understand it.

Sorry general population, wow, I keep insulting people over this one. The point is, your child may be smart and also may be suffering from ADHD, and you would be smart to avail yourselves of every possible advantage that you can for their sake.

“I used to have ADHD …”

Remember that one? The meme that states, “I used to have ADHD until my dad’s belt came off!” This is the same stuff we used to spread on the garden and fields back on the farm. If the author of this meme was being serious than they were suffering from a lack of the correct vocabulary.

Fortunately, I, a person with ADHD, and an intelligent one at that, am here to translate this meme into full English for those who’s vocabulary is limited by there lack of education, probably resulting from their abusive father’s restrictions when it came to voluntary education.

“When I was younger and suffered from ADHD symptoms my father would beat me, which caused me to temporarily be able to pay attention for a longer period of time. Good times, good times.” *sigh

Okay!

I can’t go on any longer, for two reasons.

Firstly, I’ve upset myself again.

And secondly, I’m well beyond my word count for the day.

You’ve all been swell for listening to me rant.

Thanks.

Things You Think Will Help


Kelly Babcock

I was born in the city of Toronto in 1959, but moved when I was in my fourth year of life. I was raised and educated in a rural setting, growing up in a manner I like to refer to as free range. I live in an area where my family history stretches back 6 or more generations. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 50 and have been both struggling with the new reality and using my discoveries to make my life better. I write two blogs here at Psych Central, one about having ADHD and one that is a daily positive affirmation that acts as an example of finding the good in as much of my life as I possibly can.

Find out more about me on my website: writeofway.

email me at ADHD Man


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APA Reference
Babcock, K. (2019). Things You Think Will Help. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 22, 2019, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-man/2019/09/things-you-think-will-help/

 

Last updated: 25 Sep 2019
Statement of review: Psych Central does not review the content that appears in our blog network (blogs.psychcentral.com) prior to publication. All opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the author alone, and do not reflect the views of the editorial staff or management of Psych Central. Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.