So listen, yesterday I made stew.
I’m pretty sure that it was great. I never got to eat any.
I’d ask how it was, but no one else got to eat it either.
Just as I was finishing it up, I broke a sealer jar in the pot.
Yes, I know
That’s not ADHD. Accidents happen.
A broken jar is a broken jar. ADHD is ADHD. They are neither the same thing, nor is one really responsible for the other.
The jar broke, likely, because of some slight damage to it before I used it and because I stressed it with the hot liquid from the stock pot I was cooking the stew in.
There are three big pieces of glass sitting on my stove, and at least one more in the pot still that I can hear scraping the bottom when I stir the contents but I can’t seem to get to come to the surface.
And even if I could, I’d never be certain that I’d gotten all the glass out. I also can’t strain the solids out and keep the stock because there could be micro bits of glass that could hurt or injure someone even in that.
You know how when we’re hyper focused on something and someone interrupts us, we have trouble dealing with that?
We sometimes let our emotions get the best of us. Or at the very least we have to make an effort to rein them in.
And then there’s that fugue state where we cannot concentrate, cannot figure things out for a while, can’t function.
Well, maybe not that bad …
It’s not that I’m unable to function, I was able to decide on dinner out and where to go. It was a bad choice, but not the worst choice. What I couldn’t do was work in the kitchen because the job I’d been doing was right there, unfinished, but done in a different way.
I couldn’t just dump the pot. I couldn’t even figure out how to get through straining the stock out into the drain so I could then pitch the food into the compost. I couldn’t stop thinking about the waste, the loss.
Today is a new day
Today I will go into the kitchen and in a very efficient way, execute a plan that I came up with last night when I was out of sight of the disaster. If I had needed to push through this yesterday, if this were my paid job and I had to answer to a boss, I would have done what needed doing.
But yesterday, when I was cooking for my household and this happened, I was stopped. And yes, that was ADHD.
Today, there will be another stew made. And there will be accidents. And yes, some of them will be because I am inattentive and impulsive and because I procrastinate sometimes and so some of those accidents will be the result of ADHD.
But there will be no sealer jar broken in today’s stew.
I’m too damned hungry!