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Shut up, it’s fine.

Ooops. Oh well, moving on. I want to tell you how to be perfect.

And I have to say, it’s pretty easy.

Just don’t do anything. Take no chances. Do not be adventurous.

Not working for you?

Yeah, it doesn’t work for me either.

But actually, there are still a few things you can do to come close to being perfect.

Start with forgetting

Forget all about what others expect of you. I mean, if they care about you they already know your limits and your abilities. If they care, they’ll bear those things in mind. And they’ll applaud when you do something great and they’ll understand when you foul up.

But if they don’t care, they just expect “normal” from you, they are not friends. They may have other sway over you, they may be your boss in some way. So fine, do your best, but if you fail them because of your ADHD, accept that and move on. You’re still perfect, you didn’t fail yourself.

And don’t fret …

Yeah, I know, a tough one to pull off. But the truth is that things are going to happen, some good, some bad, some indifferent. And if you spend your time worrying about any of them and trying to figure out what you could have done, you’re wasting time.

If you, like me, replay things in your head and try to fix them, you’re not just wasting time, you’re stressing yourself out. Life is too short for that crap, and the stress will make it shorter.

Let go

My mother used to say, “Let go and let God …” and I used to think she was onto something. Turns out, even though I’m not a Christian, I have to say she was right.

When my grandfather was very ill in the hospital, she prayed every night for weeks, and she couldn’t sleep, so that was a lot of praying. Everyday the news seemed worse. after nearly two months of this, she was so exhausted that she went to bed and asked God to hold her place while she slept. She told Him in a brief prayer that she was leaving the care of her father in His hands.


Surprisingly, she felt comforted by this decision and went to sleep easily for the first time in weeks. She slept through the night. When she called the hospital the next morning she got the news that her father had had a good night and was feeling much better. He was home within two weeks.

Now I’m still not a Christian, as compelling as this story is. But the idea that she could decide to leave the stress and worry in someone else’s hands has always intrigued me.

So …

So I practice that whenever I realize I need to. I don’t leave my problems in the hands of a God I don’t believe in. But I do leave them to their own fates while I take a break and recharge.

After all, if I’m going to be perfect, I need all the strength I can muster, right? And of course, I need to not care about what others think of me or my accomplishments. I may be my own worst critic, but I’m also the only critic I really need to worry about when it comes to my ADHD.


Kelly Babcock

I was born in the city of Toronto in 1959, but moved when I was in my fourth year of life. I was raised and educated in a rural setting, growing up in a manner I like to refer to as free range. I live in an area where my family history stretches back 6 or more generations. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 50 and have been both struggling with the new reality and using my discoveries to make my life better. I write two blogs here at Psych Central, one about having ADHD and one that is a daily positive affirmation that acts as an example of finding the good in as much of my life as I possibly can.

Find out more about me on my website: writeofway.

email me at ADHD Man

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APA Reference
Babcock, K. (2017). hOW tO bE pERFECT!. Psych Central. Retrieved on January 29, 2020, from


Last updated: 7 Jun 2017
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