An ambiguous title, that. Is it about challenging your life or is it about your life challenging you?
And the answer is …
Well, both, really.
If you’re here reading this because you have ADHD, then your life is challenging.
And I don’t care if you think your ADHD is a gift, it’s still a challenge. Maybe you’re right, it is a gift, but you still have the challenge of learning to use that gift and few people to turn to for help and advice.
Gift or curse …
And if you think that it’s a curse, then you have to learn to deal with the issues. And you still have few people to turn to for help.
Because none of us are the same, even advice from others with ADHD won’t always suit your needs.
And then there are the expectations
Under casual observation, we don’t look like we have a problem. We look normal enough, maybe a bit loudly dressed, and yes, probably moving fast, but still, within the realm of neuro-typical.
So those who don’t know, expect neuro-typical behaviour and accomplishments from us.
And what makes it worse is …
In many ways, we often deliver the goods. We know what is expected and we can, at the very least, emulate the actions required for the accomplishment of those expectations.
But that isn’t going to happen every time. We will get overwhelmed, we will get lost and forgetful, we will make the wrong choices and get distracted and eventually reveal ourselves to be … well, ourselves.
Acceptance is key
I’ve grown to accept my ADHD and the issues that seem to be inseparable from it. And I’ve learned to accept my life as a gift, not because of ADHD, but along with the old ADHD that is an intrinsic part of me.
And I’ve learned that, while I have a challenging life, the best thing I can do for myself is to challenge my life right back.
Now we’re getting to it!
I make the effort every day to see what is good in my life and interact with that goodness. I make the effort to accept adventure, and pay attention as best I can to the potential for joy and happiness and personal growth in those adventures.
And I now have replaced the word “No.” with the question, asked sincerely, “Why not?”
There may well be a good reason for saying no, but I no longer say no without determining what that reason is. And that has lead to the aforementioned adventures that have been changing my life in the recent past.
So yes, I have a challenging life, but it’s the only one I get, and I have no intention of letting those challenges get me down.
An eye for an eye?
And yes, part of my strategy is to challenge my life.
So if I have a challenging life, I’m challenging life right back. It all works out pretty evenly in the end, don’t you think?
Babcock, K. (2017). Challenging Life. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 25, 2018, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-man/2017/04/challenging-life/