What a smart ass looks like

What a smart ass looks like

I can’t deny it. It’s true. But the truth is that I think I could be worse. The number of times I hesitate and don’t say the thing that leaps into my mind is actually rather high.

I like to say that being a smart ass has something to do with my ancestry, and there’s a good chance that it does, but not because of where my family tree branches to.

I’m pretty sure that I can lay the blame for this squarely at the feet of my ADHD, or whatever it is that passes for feet with ADHD.

See? I can’t let it be. It’s true, truer than it appears in fact. I often can’t stop my mind from coming up with the most defiant things. And they are almost always things that others haven’t thought of.

Well, I maybe think that because they didn’t say them. But maybe they just knew better?

I usually know better

Well, I often know better. Okay, sometimes I know better.

Sometimes I just go ahead and blurt out the things I think of. I have to say that I often feel like they are just such clever things to say that I’ll be forgiven for saying them.

I’ve been told I have ODD, Oppositional defiant disorder, but I don’t see it. Sometimes what I say is oppositional and defiant, but sometimes things need to be defied and opposed. I just do it in a smart assed way. I mean, just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I’m the defiant one. You don’t agree with me and I didn’t pretend that that was your mental health issue.

Not the first time I’ve been “assessed” by an amateur

I’ve also been told I have anger issues, and man did that make me angry.

Truth is, sometimes I get angry with people. I just don’t see that as an issue. Or if it is an issue, it isn’t my issue, it’s theirs.

But why am I a smart ass?

Well, often times I believe that what I have to say needs to be said. And quite frankly, I’ve had lots of practice taking the heat for saying things that others feel were a little over the top, unwarranted, or inappropriate. Because I have ADHD, because I have a somewhat flawed executive function, because I get excited and make decisions on the spur of the moment, I do say things that bring the heat down on me.

So I’m ready!

If I feel something needs saying, I’ll say it. I’m good that way. And the consequences be damned. Let’s get past people complaining about me and move on to discussing what I said that needed saying.

And all the other times?

Oh, right. Well, all those other times that I said something inappropriate and it had no positive thing to offer, brought no valid additions to the table, let’s just say those were …. practice.

Yeah, that’s it. Practice. And exercise. I was just keeping in shape for when I do say something that needs saying.

And … you’re welcome.