There are many things that can be done the right way or the wrong way. And there are rather a lot of things that can be done different ways.
To be truthful, there are lots of people who believe that things must be done a certain way to be done the right way, even if others believe that those same things should be done a different way. Some people are just set that way and can’t be reset.
And yes, there is always a wrong way to do anything. There’s probably several wrong ways to do anything and there are some things that have many wrong ways of being done. In fact, the doing of some things is wrong. Murder, theft, and homophobic, misogynistic or bigoted actions come to mind.
Meanwhile, back to the right way …
As a contractor I can assure you that there are many wrong ways to do a lot of the things we do, and usually fewer right ways. But I find it interesting that my boss and I often do things differently but neither one of us is necessarily doing those things wrong.
Okay, sometimes we make mistakes. Sometimes it’s me doing things wrong, but sometimes it’s him. Life is messy and work is part of life.
We’re both older and we’ve seen enough years to know that the second mistake could easily be wasting time being angry about the first mistake. After something has gone wrong, the best approach is to figure out why so it doesn’t happen again, and to calmly figure out how to make right what went wrong.
But like I said, it isn’t always me. Sometimes it’s him. And sometimes it’s just the way it was going to be.
Right is right, and wrong is wrong
But when we do things differently, right or wrong, sometimes I can see that my way is probably the way someone with ADHD might be likely to do whatever we’re doing. I do have ADHD after all. I’ll be more adventurous. I’ll see a shortcut that might save time and I’ll try that. I’ll see some aspect as more important because it’s more interesting to me and do the job a different way around.
The thing is, there will almost always be right ways and wrong ways of doing things. Ways. Multiple. Many of them. And we want to try to predominantly do the right ones and try to avoid doing the wrong ones.
And the ADHD ways?
Just because we do things differently some times does not mean we are wrong. Your way might be the wrong way sometimes, but it isn’t because of your ADHD, it’s because it’s the wrong way. So don’t curse your ADHD, don’t blame it, just learn from the mistake and move on.
When people are annoyed with you and your ADHD because you do things differently, ask yourself first, if your way is causing any real problem.
If it isn’t, ask yourself next if maybe they’re annoyed because they just can’t appreciate that there are many ways to get things done.
Then lastly, ask yourself if worrying about them and their annoyance is really the best use of your time.
I’m guessing … not.