When the “Twilight” book phenomenon took off a few years ago I stayed as far away from it as possible.  As a 30-something, I wasn’t going to deign myself to read what had become a teen-craze book.  We’ve all seen those sad images of 30 and 40+ women who go gaga over fictitious love stories because they don’t have “love” in their own lives.  Saw one on the subway the other day with a “Twilight Convention” tote bag!  I didn’t want to get anywhere near that group …

… no matter how different their lives are from mine.

I have a healthy, “normal” interest in vampires – as in I enjoy reading about the historical Vlad Dracul of Transylvania.  I had no intention of being “sucked” (pardon the pun) into some ridiculous story about a human falling in love with a vampire.

When the first movies came out and the hype exploded over the actors, I turned the other way.  I get it, Robert Pattinson and Taylor Launter are cute.  But really people!  I’ll admit that when I was a teen I lusted after a member of a (to remain nameless) teen band, but I did not go hysterical over them.  Frankly when I saw interviews with Kristen Stewart I thought that she seemed distant, bored and unengaged – which made me wonder if she was a good actor.

I was able to resist the gravitational pull surrounding the craze, even as other “normal” 30-somethings I knew were reading the series.  Fast forward to April 2010.  I was taking a road trip to visit family and I wanted an audio book to keep me company and make the time go by faster.  While going through my town library’s sizeable collection of audio books, I couldn’t find anything that interested me.  I reached the “T”s and came across Twilight.  My curiosity got the better of me and I checked it out along with a back-up audio book in case I didn’t like it.

I popped the first CD in and hit the road.  Much to my chagrin I was ‘hooked’ immediately.  I was drawn into the story.  The author was able to weave a story that keeps the reader (or in my case the listener) engaged.  I was on tenterhooks wanting to know how the story was going to unfold and what was going to happen to the characters.  I finished the first audio book on that trip.

Upon returning, I took the audio versions of New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn out of the library and downloaded them onto my iPod.  I finished all four books – over 130 hours of listening – in six weeks.  I listened while commuting, riding my bike, cleaning the house – any extra time I had.  I’ve also seen the first two movies, being pleasantly surprised by Kristen Stewart’s acting and disappointed by Taylor Lautner.

Now that I’ve shared my journey into the world of vampires and werewolves, I’m going to put on my cynical hat and dissect the Twilight saga as it relates to my life and experiences.

As intriguing as it might be to have someone seemingly perfect want nothing more than to be with you every moment, it’s creepy!  The author’s Mormon faith seriously affects the way she writes.  Using Edward’s undead state as an excuse for him to not touch her or engage in anything more than hand-holding and innocent kisses.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not proposing or advocating teen sexual behavior … hell, I didn’t make my sexual debut until I was 22.  The author even makes her hero vampire chaste and virginal – he and Bella wait until they are married to have sex.  Really?!

What really gets me about the story is that Bella immediately decides she wants to change herself in to a vampire in order to stay with him.  I know every woman would like to end up with her perfect soul-mate … and if he comes in a package that looks like Robert Pattinson, all the better.  But really, haven’t we learned anything!!  Is this the kind of message we want to send to young girls?

Okay, so Edward is reluctant to change her into a vampire and sets up a series of “compromises” for Bella to accept before he will.  With this convention it seems like the author is trying to make it “okay” for Bella to want to change for him because he’s hesitant to do so.   For years we, as a society, have been fighting for women to be independent and strong without the help of a man.  Are we regressing by embracing a popular book whose heroine wants so desperately to change herself to make her more likeable and acceptable to her man?

Teens and young women are so impressionable.  This is not a good message.  I hate to say that most women, with me at the front of the line, have changed or wished to change aspects of themselves to fit with a man.  Of course it all backfired because I wasn’t being honest with myself.  I had to be true to myself in order to be true to the relationship.

Spoiler alert – read no further if you haven’t finished the series – Finally in book 4, the author contrives the old “I can’t live without you” convention by putting Bella in grave danger, a matter of life or death.  In order to save her “life!?,” Edward has to change Bella into a vampire – giving her what she wanted and making it possible for them to be together.  Sure, I kept reading because I wanted to know how the story ended (BTW – the whole Jacob and Renesmee thing … gross!).

I hope the young teens reading this series have conversations with mothers or other positive female influences in their lives, to realize that this is FICTION.  And while the stories are entertaining and engaging, this is not the way it happens in real life.  A woman should not have to change herself to be in a relationship with a man.  If you feel the need to change in order to “keep” him, run for the hills – alone!

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From Psych Central's website:
PsychCentral (July 23, 2010)

From Psych Central's website:
PsychCentral (July 26, 2010)

CHD-UK (July 27, 2010)

    Last reviewed: 23 Jul 2010