WARNING: Before reading this blog, please note the topic of Self-Injury or Non-Suicidal Self-Injury (NSSI), may be very difficult for some to take! Please read at your own discretion and risk.

(Please know: I have my Husband’s permission to publicly speak about this private matter.)

This post could be liken to fingernails scraping a blackboard or worse; SORRY! ‘Brave’ enough? - Read on:

Caregiving and coping with the very disturbing behavior of a mentally ill partner is like playing and surviving an extremely dangerous sport!

(FYI: As a Mother of 4, who doesn’t want her kids or anyone’s getting hurt, I don’t recommend extreme sports!) Can we have fun without endangering ourselves or getting hurt? Okay, THANKS for listening; enough mothering for now.  Back to the topic at hand: NSSI.

 Learning to Survive the Emotional Tsunami…

Cutting, Burning and…Poetry? Oh My!
Being married to Mental Health Humor cartoonist, Chato Stewart, for over two decades has been filled with ups and downs. VERY HIGH-HIGHS and very low-lows…extreme ebbs and flows. Our courtship and first half of marriage was beautiful, loving, joy-filled times–blessed to have married the man of my dreams and then unsuspectingly appearing (due to illness)…the man of my nightmares…the full-blown, extreme-range of intense joy and intense pain, intense emotions is beyond the limitations of my words.

CHATO is one of my greatest teachers!:) Important lessons of love, forgiveness and compassion i’ve learned through our life and struggles together. Looking back to the early years of our relationship, I can see some signs of hypomanic episodes now.

At the time, he enjoyed sweets and Chato learned to think of his mood swings as …

HOORAY, it’s MAY!:) May i ask YOU: What will YOU DO today?!

What a Privilege to be Breathing:)…Fragile-Life! Each Morning is a Gift. A fresh, new opportunity for compassion.

A New Day: HOORAY! How will YOU show appreciation for this gift. What positive choices will YOU make? What will You feed Your mind and body?! Who will YOU help?! What kind words will YOU use to comfort?!

Waking UP to a Beautiful Morning is a Blessing:

“When one ruling over mankind is righteous, ruling in the fear of God, then it is as the light of morning, when the sun shines forth, a morning without clouds. From brightness, from rain, there is grass out of the earth.”—2 Samuel 23:3, 4.

{The Hebrew verb ma·shal has the meaning “rule, dominate”; the Greek term ar’khon is translated “ruler.”}

Rulers or leaders can bring Happiness, Peace and Prosperity. Sadly, some leaders choose to act like this:

“As a growling lion and an onrushing bear is a wicked ruler over a lowly people.” Proverb 28:15

This world would be such a better place with better leadership! Don’t we all need good management skills. Effective skills to manage our lives, manage our families, manage what ails us. Good government is the cure. Good government starts in the home (at home). Does man practice good government?!

1 on-line dictionary definition of good: adjective: to be desired or approved of;  Noun: That which is morally right; righteousness; Synonyms: adjective: nice, kind, fine, Noun: benefit, profit, advantage, avail, welfare, use.

Another dictionary: Synonyms of good to contemplate: Commonsense, commonsensible, commonsensical, firm, hard, informed, just, justified, levelheaded, logical, rational, reasonable, reasoned, sensible, sober, solid, valid, well-founded.

Bottomline: Learning Goodness is the key to good management/good government…which brings better living for caregivers, partners, friends…ALL-BEAUTIFUL-BREATHING-FRAGILE-LIFE!:)   Ancient books can teach us much:

Goodness is not passive but is dynamically active. Recipients of the “good” person’s kindness, generosity, and self-sacrifice might even be moved to die for him! So it is with good …

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Being transformed…Many exercise/diet frequently spending a good portion of their time on their bodies. Some care a lot about: size, shape, health.

Why can’t people transform…their minds?…change your eating habits–change/transform your mind. People sculpt their bodies…why not mold/sculpt your brain?? Some go to great lengths to protect their health, their life. Why not protect your brain/mind?! What are you choosing to feed your mind? Junk food?! i hope NOT.
Eat Well. Live Well.
Read this interesting article (highlighted points): The Amazing World of Insects –METAMORPHOSIS—A New Look, a New Life-Style:

“Some insects totally revamp their appearance through a process called metamorphosis—literally, “change in form.” The changes can be quite dramatic. Maggots change into flies, caterpillars into butterflies, and aquatic larvae into airborne dragonflies. Hundreds of thousands of insects undergo metamorphosis. To produce such a transformation—comparable to converting a train into an airplane—huge modifications must take place inside the insect’s body. Consider the butterfly, for example. While the caterpillar is dormant in the chrysalis, most of its previous tissues and body organs break down and a whole set of new adult organs—such as wings, eyes, and antennas—develop. Often, the transformation involves taking on a new life-style. For example, while in the larval stage, the dragonfly captures small fish or tadpoles; but when it becomes a free-flying adult, it changes its diet to insects. This is the equivalent of a man spending his first 20 years swimming in the sea and the rest of his life flying around like a bird.”

“Could evolution orchestrate these incredible transformations? How could a caterpillar simply appear on the scene, programmed to transform itself into a butterfly? For that matter, which came first—the caterpillar or the butterfly? One cannot exist without the other, for only the butterfly breeds and lays eggs….Surely, the process of metamorphosis gives convincing evidence of a Master Designer.”
Points for Pondering:
IF there is a Master Designer: why not draw close to this Designer? Talk about neurons, intelligence-way-beyond-genius and then some. Couldn’t the Master Designer of the Brain…know how to transform the brain/mind/body? (Who wouldn’t want …

Saturday evening, March 9th, my family went to the circus!

Not under the big top, out in the open-night air. (Weather chilly…hoodie wear.)

A small 1 ring Loomis Brothers’ circus. It was terrific. It was terrifying…the aerial acrobats without any net: beautiful & dangerous. Beauty can be dangerous, eh?

The irony of one circus (my family) watching and being entertained by another circus…LOL…my goofy sense of humor finds this funny. Chato’s family: a bunch of clowns we are…watching other clowns perform!:)

The precision, discipline and work involved in the performances got me thinking. Precision, discipline and work needed to keep any circus aka family going!:) It’s been quite a few years since we went to the circus. i guess, we were living a circus of sorts and didn’t need to leave home -lol:)

Do You have any fun circus memories?? What is your favorite circus act?

My girls loved the ponies and went for a pony buggy ride…It was pure joy watching the kids’ reactions to the various acts: the giant smiles, giggles and deafening squeals of delight!:)

LOVED the camels…beautiful/enthralling…i could of watched the camels and doggies all night. Hubby who ADORES ALL animal-kind…(and has rescued, cared for and adopted various creatures big and small)…was worried about the treatment of the animals, in particular the camels…i was totally caught up in being mesmerized by the beauty and ability of the Amazing camels, ponies and doggies…they were so lovable and adorable, etc…that how could anyone treat them badly?!?!

*Of course, i hope this post doesn’t offend anyone who is against animals/Breathing-Fragile-Life performing…SORRY! It was funny to see the clown jump through hoops like the doggies!:) Have you jumped through any hoops lately?!…i “like” jumping rope (good exercise:), but been known to jump through some hoops when/if needed…especially to keep the PEACE!:)
“SEND in the Clowns”…to the stands…

It’s important for families, for all of us, to find some refreshment and recreation from the stressful …

Hi!:) How are You, my Reader?? Ca Va? How was Your February? How is Your personal journey/race of compassion going? THANKS for living compassion!:)

My February ended on a Super-Nice note! i hope Yours did as well!:) (Not sure IF you’ve read my previous post referring to my Brother?) i’m loving skype right now -lol:) You guessed it…got to skype with Him and his Wife! It’s been way tooo long since an opportunity for us to communicate came along…circumstances.  (i’m tough to reach…so is he.) i have this really goofy smile stuck on my face and hopefully: it won’t go away!-lol:) A comforting word at just the right time is oh how good!!…good for the weary warriors of compassion. Don’t tire out in your personal race/battle….for compassionate living!:) Hoping You hear some comforting words!:)

It’s always a great wake-up to reality to hear of his compassion adventures in Haiti. The life there and life here…what contrasts. We have so much materially/opportunities here in the States…many in our International Family of Beautiful-Breathing-Fragile-Life will never experience what some view as entitlements of luxuries. Some of our Local & International Family of Beautiful-Breathing-Fragile-Life will struggle their whole existence just to subsist on little food, little comfort, little help, little love. Little is better than nothing, eh?

What can i give You today? What can i share…a little food, a little comfort, a little help, a little love?:) What comfort can You bring to those in Your care?! What comfort can You share/bring to anyone/anything crossing Your path today? You have a gift, Please share it!:)

“In Reading there is sort of a half and half mixture. The book must be good, but the reader must also be active.”~Ralph Waldo Emerson

A new month, new work, new goals, new learning…new friends? Here’s some “new” ? thoughts for You to think:

3 Proverbs & Act on?

(Proverbs 29:11) “All his spirit is what a stupid one lets out, but he that is wise keeps it calm to the last.”

Are You calm? Do You exercise self-restraint? Are You easily provoked? Learning to exercise self-control can lead to more compassionate choices …

What is holding your mind? What is holding your heart? Love? Fear? Accurate Knowledge? Superstition? Impartiality? Partiality? Nationalism? Universal Hospitality?

Sadly, we live in a divided world, country(s), region(s), neighborhood(s). A world/globe divided by mind-made/man-made/fear-made/prejudice-made borders, boundaries, divisions, differences, discriminations and fears.

Are you personally able to promote peace by embracing the concept of an International Brotherhood of Breathing-Fragile-Life encompassing our globe? Of course, how can one embrace an International Brotherhood if one cannot embrace their local neighbor? How can one embrace their local Neighbor if one cannot embrace their Mother, Father, Sister, Brother under the same roof?

Human Race = Fragile Family! Family = Gift! Do You Cherish Your Family?  Do You Appreciate Your Gift? i do!:) (Who doesn’t like getting a gift?:)

The human condition is flawed…on varying levels so, at times, family doesn’t get along like it should!:( How can we all: “better” get along?

We all need to get better, get well: mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually…one way is by cultivating love and compassion and empathy and forgiveness!:) It takes education and patience. It takes work and effort. It takes practice and application…in the home, in the neighborhood, at school, at work, etc.

i like/prefer simple, practical solutions to challenges: tweaking. So, i like “practical,” ancient wisdom:

“Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely, if anyone has a cause for complaint against another…Clothe yourselves with love, for it is the perfect bond of union.” (Colossians 3:13, 14)

All of us have a cause for complaint!…i’m sure some of my Readers have a cause of complaint toward me that i may not be aware of…SORRY!:(…THANKS for putting up with me! SORRY to offend & THANKS for Reading/Supporting my blog!:)…when i’m trying to put up with someone who’s irritating me or worse…i try to think of the situation like this:  As a Mom…babies are so cute, adorable and loveable…yet, they do seemingly offensive/gross stuff..i.e. spit up on you, poop on you, etc. You LOVE the baby sooo much…you don’t hold it against …

Listen! It’s beautiful! Don’t You want to hear? Share?…You care…enough to know.

Do You tolerate people with a different point of view?! (Well, as long as i “remain” right or come off “correct!”-lol…some “may” feel deep down!:)

F~l~e~x~i~b~i~l~i~t~y is a sign of physical health as well as emotional, mental…i’ll throw in spiritual health, too. Our range of muscle motion is indicative of our wellness. When it comes to your compassion, what is your personal range of motion?! Are you flexible? or ridgid? Can you bend and stretch a little or are you too stiff?…stiff in your thinking and actions?!

Can you o-p-e-n-y-o-u-r-m-i-n-d and s   t   r   e   t   c   h further by “trying” to “understand” others and their beliefs? Whether you’re into science or spirituality or not…many among our global-family of beatiful-breathing-fragile-life…are! Just because something doesn’t matter to you or me doesn’t mean it isn’t important to someone somewhere!:) What matters to you? Don’t you appreciate when others take your feelings/thoughts into consideration…like you matter!:)

“As far as scholars have discovered, there has never existed any people, anywhere, at any time, who were not in some sense religious.” ~The New England Britannica

“To study different religions need not imply infidelity to one’s own faith, but rather it may be enlarged by seeing how other people have sought for reality and have been enriched by their search.”~World Religions–From Ancient History to the Present.”

For me, i may not personally (adhere to) “believe” in your particular religion/belief system, but i RESPECT your right of choice. I may not totally agree with your take on reality, but i RESPECT it’s your take and you have the right to reality! We all make choices. We live with the results of those choices. Will i exhibit compassion toward my Fellow-Breathing-Fragile-Life by trying to understand/comprehend you better and “your reality” in which you choose to live…SURE!..i will!:) My personal quest for truth behoves me. My personal quest to live love/compassion/truth behoves me. What behoves You?!

“If I as a geologist were called upon to …

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Peak-a-boo! Eye See You! “May You Be Well and also Your household Be Well and All that You Have Be Well!”

Every baby loves the game Peak-a-boo…(and some adults, too!:) an early game of early, morning trust and early, morning (new) relationship building…between mother and child, etc. The game/fun never gets old! Whether you’re hiding behind a pair of binoculars, a telescope or computer screen…an “early”/encrypted form of communication, language, laughter and learning. Fun! (who…m–doesn’t enjoy some…fun! No matter what your age!:)

Peak-a-boo–the (young) game of innocence and learning…the game between teacher and student…

Is it A or B or an Enigma?! Mystery…s…olved:

An experimenter hides an attractive toy under box “A” within the baby’s reach. The baby searches for the toy, looks under box “A”, and finds the toy. This activity is usually repeated several times (always with the researcher hiding the toy under box “A”). Then, in the critical trial, the experimenter moves the toy under box “B”, also within easy reach of the baby. Babies of 10 months or younger typically make the perseverance error, meaning they look under box “A” even though they saw the researcher move the toy under box “B”, and box “B” is just as easy to reach. This demonstrates a lack of, or incomplete, schema of object permanence. Children of 12 months or older typically do not make this error.
Competing explanations
Traditionally, this phenomenon has been explained as the child seeing an image and remembering where it was, rather than where it is. Other accounts deal with the development of planning, reaching, and deciding things. There are also behaviorist accounts that explain the behavior in terms of reinforcement. This account argues that the repeated trials with hiding the toy in box “A” is reinforcing that specific behavior, so that the child still reaches for box “A” because the action has been reinforced before. However, this account does not explain the shift in behavior that occurs around 12 months.

Smith and Thelen[1] used a dynamic systems approach to the A-not-B task. They found that various components …

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Prince sang: “I would die 4 U” and the Gingerbread man (yes, Gingerbread man:) sang: “Run, run, run as fast as you can. You’ll never catch me I’m the Gingerbread man. He trusted the fox to help his plan and that was the end of the Gingerbread man.“~by Shauna Tominey (www.storytimesongs.com)

“Let me help you. I’m your friend. I can take you away from all this. Hop on my tail and I’ll take you across the river.” So the Gingerbread man jumped onto the fox’s tail. A while later, the fox said-”Jump onto my back. I’m sinking, you don’t want to get wet.”  So the Gingerbread man jumped onto the fox’s back. A while later, the fox said, ‘Jump onto my head. I’m sinking, you don’t want to get wet.’ So the Gingerbread man jumped onto the fox’s head. Finally, the fox flicked the Gingerbread man up in the air, opened his mouth and gobbled him up with his sharp, sharp teeth. When he was done he laughed and licked his lips. Gingerbread, gingerbread that’s stuff for me. Gingerbread, gingerbread I’ve had some for my tea.” ~The Story Museum “Gingerbread Man”

i “would” die “for” You! (if You want me to) Would you die for me, too?! (Think about it! I’ll get back to that in a few…a few words or so. Besides, your answer “would” depend on your view of death…oh and life, too and your view of me and you, (relationships in general)…and whether or not you eat (or are tempted by) gingerbread-lol:)

Do you run away from problems/challenges or face them/endure them /resolve them? Who do You trust as “friend”? Who do you trust for guidance/help? (It’s a lonely life with no one to trust.)

Would your “friend” die for You or gobble You up when sinking?!

Yeah, you may be “thinking” who is this chick and WHY is she asking such (life/death) question(s)??? Where is this post headed?? Read on/find out. (Though, not sure if i can round out this topic in 1 post or not?) All i can do …