Compassion Conversation 1
As Caregivers and Partners, breathing-fragile life, we use a specific, particular set of words and vocabulary to aid/help other breathing-fragile life. How wide or cramped is your “caregiver” vocabulary? (Caregivers should speak compassion!:) How fluent or fluid is your compassion conversation??
Thoughts, words, speech, language, communication…obviously, interest me much as a talker!:) (If you wish, you can check out my previous posts: A Leader’s Language: Are You Fluent? or A Compassionate Caregiver Cries)
Talking is one means of learning. Listening is probably a better way of learning! Yeah, you’re correct, I need to listen more, eh?
Researchers have found that while the limbic system of our brain helps us focus on one thing while sustaining ability to hear various sounds–differentiating between many sounds becomes difficult when it involves simultaneously listening to human speech. When 2 voices compete for your ear to whom do you listen?!
I read this eye-opener point or rather ear-opener: “What we desire influences the way we hear!” What do you desire? We select the speech we listen to/focus on depending on which one (person) we “want” to hear!
Do you pay attention?…
Part of our regulatory auditory mechanism, which tunes and de-tunes our attention process, is the limbic system. It is responsible for assigning more or less attention to a given auditory input. So, if there are multiple auditory inputs, the input most relevant to our conscious and subconscious mechanism receives top priority. When the limbic system detects new and/or more relevant information, it passes it on to the auditory cortex for processing. At the same time, a certain emotional association is assigned to it. ~The Hearing Journal/Role of Limbic System by Natan Bauman, PhD
Getting our emotions and/or desires under control or not, could hinder or help our learning!:) Let’s hope the voice that wins our listening (and/or affection) is a wise one and not a stupid one!:) Let’s hope this person (voice) is a “true” friend out for our best interests and not for his/her own! Is a True Friend a people-pleaser, ear-pleaser or neither-pleaser?! May be, we should “listen” to the unexpected/unsolicited voices that cross our path?! New, fresh voices could teach new, fresh things. (Of course, be careful/discerning.)
I believe, a true Friend tells You what you need to hear and not what you want to hear! Do you listen to what you “want” to hear? or What you “need” to hear?! Needing and wanting are very different as You know. We could damage ourselves or others if our listening (and/or learning) is limited to what we want to hear!
THANKS for reading my post…but remember, i’m NOT telling You what You want to hear here!:) That’s not my job, that position in your life is probably filled already?…usually by a yes woman or a yes man…we may collect/surround ourselves with “Yes” people feeding our ego. May be, no! is indicative of true friendship and affection?! How many persons in your life (friends) tell you NO!? or tell you what you need to hear?! (Something to consider.)
Daily (compassion, etc) vocabulary lessons necessary …I wish my vocabulary could “adequately” express what I mean to express, but for now it is limited. (This limitation leads to frustration.) Language change/thinking pattern change…proficiency is a worthwhile goal! Behavior shapes our language. Of course, most of us don’t live a pastoral life and our language reflects our current state of stress-living, survival-living, materialistic-living values. What shapes your thought patterns and language? What shapes your values–your speech? Who or what shapes your listening? What emotion directs your listening? Do we listen out of fear? Do we listen out of LOVE? both?…
Simple-serene-thoughtful-living has strong appeal to me. What i would term: Peaceful-Picnic* living…(will elaborate/define in another post: Compassion Conversation 2)
A salient point:
“There exists the one speaking thoughtlessly as with the stabs of a sword, but the tongue of the wise ones is a healing.“~Proverb 12:18
A wise, care-giving tongue heals! Don’t we all need healing??…Refreshment and comfort and helpful words that console and reassure us when we are in doubt! Words that gain our trust and listening; giving us a big bear hug of security and love. Words that express and teach us the language of love in action (compassion) and consideration. I hope your ears hear compassion today (everyday)…but, will you listen?:)
Winifred, J. (2012). Compassion Conversation 1. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 1, 2015, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/wellness/2012/11/1-compassion-conversation/