This week Anna Guest-Jelley — a close friend and founder of the ever powerful Curvy Yoga — and I introduced you to our eBook Heart to Heart: 20 Poems, Meditations + Affirmations to Embrace Your Body & Cultivate Kindness.
(You can learn more here. Plus, until Tuesday, the 19th, enter the code “HEART” to save $5.)
Today, I wanted to share a new poem with you about being worthy. Because it’s so easy to internalize the message that we must earn our self-worth with accolades, accomplishments and changes in appearance.
When you feel this way, when you second-guess your self-worth, if it resonates with you, return to this reminder.
As I’m reading through The Power of No: Because One Little Word Can Bring Health, Abundance and Happiness by James Altucher and Claudia Azula Altucher, I’ve been thinking about all the things we can say no to. (I’ve already mentioned their book in this post.)
Because saying no helps us make room for the important yeses in our lives — the yeses that nourish and serve us.
Because saying no leaves us with more time, energy and even health. It’s how we can listen to ourselves, stand up for ourselves and practice compassionate self-care.
Honest, open communication is key for healthy relationships. Talking to your loved ones about your concerns, needs, conflicts — and truly listening to their concerns, needs and conflicts — strengthens your bond.
The same is true for your relationship with yourself. It’s important to regularly ask ourselves about our needs, concerns and preferences. And, like all effective communication, it’s important for us to listen to what we hear.
Doing so creates a solid, strong connection to our inner selves (our real selves). It provides important insights to help us make good decisions, to create lives that honor and nourish us.
Today is my 32nd birthday. Every year, for my b-day, I’ve been republishing a version of the below post. It’s become sort of a tradition around here.
In it, I share what I’ve learned about body image, well-being and life in my years on this earth thus far. Why 35? Extra lessons for good measure and good luck!
1. Be you.
In all your amazing and unique glory. Trying to be like others or pretending you like something you actually don’t doesn’t work. Trust me, I’ve tried. It feels awkward and itchy. And then there’s the matter of life being too short.
Find out who you are. Explore your likes and dislikes. Explore what makes you happy. Explore what feeds you, what gets you up in the early hours of the day. Spend time by yourself. Take yourself out on dates.
This week I read two powerful posts on being ourselves, which I immediately pasted into Evernote, because they’re key reminders for me.
In one post Therese Borchard talks about wanting to be Gretchen Rubin and struggling with her commencement speech for her alma mater.
I just read this great post from Dani Shapiro on Marianne’s blog. In it she explains that we don’t need confidence to write something great. In fact, confidence gets in the way. She writes:
Show me a confident writer, and in all likelihood you will also be showing me work that falls short of originality or greatness — because originality and greatness come from the willingness to take risks. To leap into the void. To do what scares you. And while it may seem that this leap would take confidence, what it really takes to leap is courage. Which is a whole other kettle of fish.
Courage isn’t the same as being fearless. It’s doing that thing, anyway, despite the fear, despite the panic.
As I wrote in my other post, when speaking these statements to yourself, try to use a gentle, soft, caring voice, as though you are speaking to a child or the person you love most in this world.
This might feel strange or uncomfortable at first. But give it a try. Pick statements that resonate with you — statements that feel true and real.
I love this powerful post from Joyce on 50 loving sentiments to say to our partners, family members and friends. It inspired me to think of the statements we can say to ourselves. Because so many of us get stuck in a self-critical dialogue. So many of us get stuck ruminating over the same harsh thoughts.
I’m too big to wear that. I’m not pretty or smart enough. I can’t tell them no. They’ll hate me! I’m such a failure. No one makes such stupid mistakes. My body is disgusting. Wow, am I an idiot.
The good news is we can change our inner dialogue. We can learn to be kinder to ourselves. With practice.
A positive body image goes beyond liking your looks. It encompasses taking good care of yourself and leading a fulfilling life. In this weekly series, I share some of my favorite posts from some of my favorite bloggers on this topic. Sometimes I also share relevant pieces that I’ve written elsewhere. Hope you find these links inspiring!
You are insatiable.
“There is no human experience that we have alone. It’s up to each of us to tear town the chambers of isolation that comparison and fear build.”
Every Monday features a tip, activity, inspiring quote or some other tidbit that helps boost your body image, whether directly or indirectly — and hopefully kick-starts the week on a positive note!
Got a tip for improving body image? Email me at mtartakovsky at gmail dot com, and I’ll be happy to feature it.
Rosie recently penned a beautiful post on exploring what feeds us. She writes: “What feeds your soul? Takes you to a place of satisfaction and the feeling of being well cared for… by you.”