Archives for Healthy Coping - Page 2

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10 Simple Questions to Help You Identify or Clarify Your Needs

I've said this before many times, but that's because I think it's so important: Our relationship with ourselves is the foundation for all relationships. It's the foundation of everything. Part of this relationship involves having a dialogue with ourselves. It involves identifying our needs and responding to them. Because this is also the foundation for a fulfilling life.

And this is where questions can help. Today, I'm sharing questions you can contemplate regularly to take compassionate care of yourself.

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Finding Lessons in Trials, Triumphs and Everyday Life

One of the things that helps us avoid bashing ourselves and getting bogged down by life's challenges is to have a learning mindset. To look at everything (or at least most things) as a lesson to be learned. For instance, just yesterday, I read this excellent piece by Todd Henry. In it he recounts all the frustrating things that happened after he gave a talk in Colorado: dealing with a delayed flight, missing his connecting flight home, having to stay at a hotel overnight, missing the hotel shuttle, only eating breakfast all day.

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General

Self-Care Sunday: A Reminder

We often think that self-care is optional. Or self-care is selfish. Or it's about being lazy. Or we think we can finally access self-care when we lose weight. When we fit into an old pair of jeans. When we meet a certain goal. When life stops being so busy.

We think we have to earn the right to take care of ourselves. It's as though self-care is the reward for working a long day. It's the reward for acing a presentation or completing a project. It's the reward for skipping dessert.

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Self-Care Sunday: Setting an Intention for Your Day

At the beginning of every yoga class we're encouraged to set an intention for our practice. I've picked intentions such as self-compassion and fun. They're simple but powerful to me.

Because every time I want to compare myself to the rockstar yogi to my right, I try to respond with self-compassion. I remind myself that everyone is different. I remind myself that starting anything is hard. That being new to something tends to bring out my inner critic.

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Helpful Ways to Shift Your Perspective

All of us experience hard times. So it helps to have a toolbox of healthy strategies we can turn to. In fact, it helps to have a toolbox for navigating every day. Because so much of life is how we look at it. This might be anything from dealing with a difficult situation to tackling our to-do lists.

One helpful strategy is shifting our perspective. This doesn't mean glossing over our feelings. Because feeling our feelings is vital (and healthy). And it doesn't mean pretending that things are rosy, when they're clearly painful and hard or overwhelming or super busy (and overwhelming).

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Reframing How We See Our Bodies

Last weekend I was browsing through the book Unexpected Art: Serendipitous Installations, Site-Specific Works, and Surprising Interventions. One artist's words -- Tomoko Konoike -- especially struck me: "I consider my body not as an object, but first and foremost as a 'place' for internal experience. I think of my artwork, then, as a sort of tool for shifting myself from this inner world of my body to another world..."
This made me wonder: What if we, too, saw our bodies as the places for our internal experience? As the containers of our ideas, questions, compassion, wonder, love? How might we treat them differently then?
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General

Self-Care Sunday: Dealing with Bad Days

Some days are just harder than others. Some days you wake up drained. You don't feel like talking to anyone. In fact, you don't feel like doing anything at all. The smallest of actions seem to require the most energy (like getting out of bed). Energy you don't happen to have. Some days the world looks darker. You feel like you've failed one too many times.

You're officially having a bad day -- even though nothing particularly bad has happened.

Here's what I've found to be helpful on those days:

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