Archives for Healthy Coping

Body Image

Writing Lists for a Better Body Image, Self-Care and Well-Being

In the book Listful Thinking: Using Lists to be More Productive, Highly Successful, and Less Stressed, author Paula Rizzo talks about the many helpful lists we can make.* For Rizzo lists have been a life-saver, helping her do everything from finding an apartment in Manhattan to navigating her busy days as a TV producer.

I make a lot of lists, too, because they help me organize the random racing thoughts preoccupying my mind. They help me break down messy, complicated things into feasible smaller steps. They help me feel less overwhelmed. They help me create a plan of action. They give my life structure. And lists even give me insights into who I am.

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Body Image

Why We Should Listen to Our Inner Critics

Have you found yourself in this situation: You're working on treating yourself with more compassion. But then your inner critic starts: You're enormous. Ugly. Stupid. Undeserving. Lazy. Are you sure you should be relaxing? Are you sure you want to do that presentation or ask for a promotion? Are you sure you're good enough? You're not.


And as these thoughts spill out, you feel disappointed, maybe even angry: Really? Why am I still so hard on myself? What the hell is wrong with me?

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Body Image

You Are Not a Number

In an earlier post I talked about the different small ways we can embrace ourselves. In one tip I suggested tossing out the scale. Because you're not a number.

But sometimes, it feels like we are. Doesn't it?

Sometimes, we become convinced that the number on the scale means everything, dictates everything -- from our happiness to our relationship status to our worth as a human being.

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Books

Self-Care Sunday: Focusing on Your Relationships

One of the most important parts of self-care is cultivating connection. This includes cultivating a connection with ourselves and with others. When it comes to others, it's important to surround ourselves with people who genuinely care about us, and to focus on building healthy relationships with those individuals.

Think of the people in your life who've been tremendously supportive. The people who've had some sort of positive influence on you. The person you can call to spill a secret to. The person you can call with good or bad news. The person who's taught you an important lesson. Who's held your hand during a rough time. Who always makes you laugh. Who truly listens. Who helped you in some sweet or compassionate way. Who accepts you for you.

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Body Image

Reframing Negative Thoughts Into Helpful Questions

Yesterday, I wrote about cultivating curiosity (instead of berating or criticizing ourselves). Today, I'm exploring curiosity, again, because it's such a powerful tool in building a more positive body image and taking compassionate care of ourselves.

All of us experience negative thoughts, particularly about ourselves. And some of us experience them on repeat. While we might not be able to stop our brains from spitting out negative thoughts, we can reframe them -- instead of interpreting these thoughts as truths.

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Body Image

Instead of Criticizing Yourself Cultivate Curiosity

Instead of getting frustrated with our bodies, our reactions or our feelings, we can get curious. Instead of berating ourselves, we can dig deeper. We can explore why we're having certain emotions and reactions. We can scour our mistakes for lessons. We can examine what triggers our emotional overeating and what we really need instead.

I love the concept of curiosity because it's a powerful way to engage with ourselves and our environment. When we're curious, we're more present. We're more open to learning. We get to know our needs. We get to know ourselves. We can use the information we learn to truly nourish ourselves.

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General

Reminders for the Days You Need Extra Self-Care

Sometimes when we need extra self-care because we're absolutely exhausted or struggling with something difficult, we get down on ourselves. We think about all the things we "should" be. We should be more productive. We should be less "dramatic," less sensitive to everything. We should need less tending. We should be stronger.


We start making a mental list of everyone else who does so much more than us; everyone else who does what we're too tired to do. Several times a day. They work harder. They work out harder. They don't need so much time to heal or recover.

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General

When You’re Super Tired With No Vacation in Sight

Lately, I've been tired. Really tired. Long to-do lists. Lots of writing. Lots of worries. There are no catastrophes or terrible concerns. My brain simply feels stalled from too much doing and going, in need of a long break. And long breaks aren't available. At least not yet. I imagine this is how parents (or anyone in a demanding job) feel. Likely very often.

So I thought it'd be helpful to make a list of small, brief ways we can inject a dose of energy or calm. This way we don't feel as depleted and worn-out. Because one of the most draining things is realizing that you won't be able to relax for a very long time.

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Body Image

The Power of Self-Care

When I practice self-care, I am myself. The veil of overwhelm lifts and reveals the core of me. I am silly, playful, compassionate, curious, understanding, patient and energetic. I'm still imperfect. I still make mistakes. I still stumble and struggle. But my body and mind reconnect. We're no longer two separate beings, both miserable and holding our breaths.

In other words, when I get enough sleep, eat nutrient-rich foods, move my body, respond to my needs, savor rest and relaxation, I feel most like myself. I feel more comfortable in my own skin. I'm more present.

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