Every Monday features a tip, activity, inspiring quote or some other tidbit that helps boost your body image, whether directly or indirectly — and hopefully kick-starts the week on a positive note!

Got a tip for improving body image? Email me at mtartakovsky at gmail dot com, and I’ll be happy to feature it. I’d love to hear from you!

Years ago, when it came to my physical appearance, I used to wish for everything under the sun: thicker hair, a clearer complexion, whiter teeth, tanner skin, flatter stomach, smaller hips and more muscle.

In her excellent book, Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self-Acceptance, author Rosie Molinary shares the story of one woman who used to wish for good skin. She told Molinary: “I used to say I wish I had good skin, but in reality, the only thing I wish for is to be accepted by society as another form of beautiful.”

I wonder if the core of many of our wishes is a desire for acceptance. It was for me.

Many of us think that changing ourselves will lead to acceptance — both from others and within ourselves.

Even if acceptance isn’t at the core of your wishes, maybe there’s something else that is — peace, a loving relationship, success, happiness.

According to Molinary, “When we wish for happiness to be accessible to us only after we have changed ourselves — sometimes in ways that aren’t even possible — the possibility for happiness isn’t just fleeting, it’s a torturing tease.”

That’s why she suggests readers change our wishes. As she writes, “What if what you wished for was to be considered enough — in all ways — just as you are?”

It’s a powerful question and one that we need to ask ourselves, because we may be pursuing something — with all our might — that we don’t even really want.

So, today, dig deeper into your wishes. Do you really want that wish you’ve been wishing for for a while or is there something lurking behind it that’s your real desire?

And if there is, consider how you can make it happen. If happiness is your wish, consider what that word means to you and the habits you can cultivate, such as finding the sacred in the everyday, learning to accept yourself and building healthier relationships.

What do you really wish for? 

By the way, be sure to check out Molinary’s beautiful blog, if you aren’t reading it already. There’s so much inspiration there!

And don’t forget to comment on this post to win a copy of Susannah Conway’s beautiful book! Tomorrow is the last day.

 


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    Last reviewed: 7 Feb 2014

APA Reference
Tartakovsky, M. (2012). Body Image Booster: Revise Your Wishes. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 22, 2014, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/weightless/2012/06/body-image-booster-revise-your-wishes/

 

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