I used to view my body as the enemy. It made me overeat. It wasn’t thin enough. It wasn’t muscular. It didn’t have a fast metabolism. It wouldn’t submit to my insults or demands. It had flaws.

So I’d get angry, irritated and frustrated with it. And I wouldn’t treat it right. I wouldn’t walk it. I wouldn’t work out for the health of it but for the thin of it. I wouldn’t feed it well. I wouldn’t nourish it.

But as I got older, discovered the true benefits of exercise — that it makes me stronger, builds endurance, that it helps me relieve my anxiety, that it makes me proud of myself — and stopped dieting, I earned a greater respect for my body. After all, it’s what helps me move, hug my loved ones, write my posts, lift weights, do squats, see the world. These things may seem obvious. But how quickly we forget when we’re busy seeing our bodies as adversaries. And we’re lucky we can do these things. We really are.

I realized my body wasn’t my foe. I was. I was sabotaging myself. I should be my body’s biggest fan. I should treat it with respect, kindness and sympathy. Instead of punishing, guilt-ridden workouts that aim to purge my body of high-cal foods, I should do what feels good to my body. Workouts that empower me, that foster health – not hurt.

Again, this may seem obvious, no big epiphany. But many of us have certain expectations for our bodies, certain standards we have to meet or surpass. And if we don’t, we abandon our bodies. We become fair-weather friends. How we feel about our bodies is conditional. If your body is at an “ideal” weight, you’re good to it. You praise it. You wear pretty clothes. You’re happy. If your body is too large, too thick, too thin, not muscular enough, you mistreat it or insult it or both. You hide your body in roomy, unflattering clothes. You criticize. You curse. You bash.

Today, I want to challenge you: Work toward becoming your body’s best friend. Work toward loving it unconditionally. It does a lot for you. Try your best to acknowledge that.

Do you view your body as the enemy? Why? If you’ve started seeing your body in a new, nicer light, what changed?

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Dr. John Grohol (December 4, 2009)

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    Last reviewed: 4 Dec 2009