Students Articles

7 Ways to Meet the Locals and Make Friends – in Your Travels and in Everyday Life

Wednesday, March 4th, 2015

shutterstock_66383296I wish I could say that there are many reporters at prestigious publications who routinely write about single people, and do so in enlightened ways. At the moment, there seems to be just one – Stephanie Rosenbloom, a travel writer at the New York Times.

I’ve mentioned her work here before, in this post and this one. Her most recent article about single people and solo travelers is “A solo traveler’s guide to meeting people.” It is worth reading the whole thing. Here I’ll just give you the listicle version of how to meet the locals and make friends, and skip over the safety tips that are also included in the article.


115 Years Old, Still Single, and Still Living Alone

Sunday, March 1st, 2015

italian240“Can staying single really help you live forever?” That was the headline of a story at Fusion, picking up on an article at the New York Times that zipped around the internet soon after it was published – fittingly, on Valentine’s Day.

Our heroine is Emma Morano of Italy, born in 1899 and now one of the five oldest people in the world. She has been single since 1938 (so, for 77 years). Times reporter Elisabeth Povoledo said of Morano that she is “convinced that being single for most of her life…has kept her kicking.” In Morano’s own words, “I didn’t want to be dominated by anyone.”


Patricia Arquette, Jon Stewart, and the No Good, Very Bad Week for Women Who Are Single or Have No Kids

Wednesday, February 25th, 2015

patricia240To be single or an adult with no kids is to be in a group that is often stereotyped, stigmatized, or ignored. Those derogated and marginalized categories are different from other stigmatized categories, such as certain racial groups, because there is far less awareness of the prejudice and discrimination. That means that there is also less effort put into the avoidance of boorish behavior toward people in those groups. And it means that sometimes even people who consider themselves open-minded and anything but bigoted in fact behave badly – without even realizing it.

In just the past few days, there have been two high-profile examples. The first has already gotten so much attention that there is a backlash to the backlash. I’m talking about Patricia Arquette’s acceptance speech at the 2015 Oscars when she won the award for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Boyhood. Here’s the key part:


The Invisible Boyfriend or Girlfriend: Best New Thing for Playful Subversives?

Saturday, February 21st, 2015

invisible240Have you heard about the new, hot things called The Invisible Boyfriend and The Invisible Girlfriend? It’s getting buzz all over the place. NPR explains that “Matthew Homann says he came up with the idea a few years ago, when he was newly single from a divorce and people wouldn’t stop asking him if he was seeing anyone.”


Check Your Marital Privilege

Saturday, February 14th, 2015

cats240[This article is co-authored – in alphabetical order – by Lisa Arnold, Rachel Buddeberg, Christina Campbell, and Bella DePaulo. We are cross-posting it on all of our blogs.]

“White privilege” and “male privilege” are familiar concepts in our cultural conversations. There is, however, another vast swath of unearned privileges that have gone largely unrecognized, even though they unfairly advantage about half of the adult population in the United States. We’re talking about marital privileges. People who marry enjoy social, cultural, economic, and political advantages that single people do not, simply because they are married.


The Worst — and Best — of Valentine’s Day

Thursday, February 12th, 2015

girlfriends2340It is that time of year when my inbox fills up with emails from people asking for favors. They want me to promote their products about dating and mating, and assume that because my blog and my books have “single” in the title, of course I would be interested in doing so. They’ve never read any of my work, nor that of any other person writing about single people in a way that is not saturated with singlism.


Part 2: What’s Wrong with These Claims about Single People?

Tuesday, February 10th, 2015

adultson240Let’s continue our discussion from the previous post. We’re critiquing the reasons offered to the New York Times for why, in some families, all of the grown children are single.

Here’s another quote from Helen Fisher. This time, she is talking about the parents of the grown children who said that they might miss having grandchildren in some ways, but really, it would not be so bad:


What’s Wrong with These Claims about Single People? Part 1

Friday, February 6th, 2015

In my previous post, I invited readers here and elsewhere to talk back to claims made in the New York Times about why, in some families, all of the grown kids are single. Here I’ll share some of those insights, and tell you my own take. (You can find more discussion in the comments of that previous post and also here.)


Where Were You When You Realized You Love Your Single Life?

Saturday, January 31st, 2015

computer240It is something all single people have experienced. We are asked to answer some security questions to set up an account, only to find that a disproportionate number of those questions just assume that we are married. Amy Gutman, a facilitator of the OpEd Project, recently described an experience in which every one of the security questions made the Spouse Assumption. She wrote about it in “Singled Out: The Cultural Bias Against Single People,” for Boston’s NPR station, WBUR.


Is That Really a Deficit — Or Just a Difference? Fair-Mindedness in Research and in Life

Monday, January 26th, 2015

strawsIn our everyday lives, we can be intensely aware of the ways we differ from other people. As observers, we cannot help but notice how some people differ from others. When those differences have the potential to be viewed negatively, we are confronted with one of the most fundamental issues in matters of fairness: Is the difference really a deficit, or is it just a difference?

Some of the most significant stories of social justice are those that succeed in achieving a widespread transformation in ways of thinking – from a prejudice that sees the difference as a deficit to a more fair-minded assessment of the difference as just that, a difference.


 

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Recent Comments
  • Alan: I like that last suggestion. I’ve found success with Meetup. If you take the time to research the groups...
  • Bella DePaulo, Ph.D: Thanks, James. I’ll take a look.
  • James: I think you made a mistake with your links… you meant to link to something at amazon, but both links go...
  • bill: this may sound odd but as a guy, I can identify with this woman. I don’t want to be dominated by anyone...
  • Simone: Indeed. A fantastic story. Much happiness to you.
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