Relationships Articles

Candidates as Wedding Dresses: Why Does Only This Ad Get Mocked?

Monday, October 20th, 2014

shutterstock_109777886Single women are not evenhanded when it comes to their political preferences. They vote overwhelmingly for Democrats. Republicans have noticed, and in an attempt to attract more of them to the GOP, they created a series of ads. I wonder if they thought long and hard about what kind of message would appeal to single women voters. What they came up with was pure, unadulterated matrimania.

Brittany, a single woman trying on wedding dresses, is the star of the ad. The different dresses are described with the names of different candidates. Brittany loves “The Rick Scott” (Republican candidate) but her mom, the goat of the ad, urges her daughter to go for “The Charlie Crist” (the Democratic candidate) because she knows best. In the end, Brittany and her friends are popping champagne corks in celebration. It all worked out, we learn, because Brittany said yes to Rick Scott. (Different variations of the exact same ads are used in other races, simply substituting the names of the relevant candidates.)


What Would Happen If Every School Had a Leader Like This?

Friday, October 17th, 2014

shutterstock_218773501If you were a school teacher or principal or a college president, what do you think you could say to your students that might really matter?

There are probably lots of good answers to that question. I found one that struck me as particularly impressive in a New Yorker profile of the person who has been president of Bard College for 40 years, Leon Botstein.

Botstein visited the members of the Bard conservatory orchestra just as they were about to depart for a European tour. Here’s how writer Alice Gregory described what Botstein had to say:


What’s So Great About Traveling on Your Own?

Monday, October 13th, 2014

shutterstock_194417003When Abigail Butcher was in her twenties, the mere thought of traveling on her own made her “recoil with dread.” She had the usual fears that people harbor about traveling alone or even dining alone – that other people will think you are a loser with no friends, or you might find the experience boring, or you might miss out on all the fun you would have if you were doing those things with other people.


World Mental Health Day: Scholarly and Personal Perspectives

Friday, October 10th, 2014

shutterstock_93242509October 10, 2014 is World Mental Health Day. Here at PsychCentral, bloggers have been invited to join the discussion. The theme this year is “living with schizophrenia.” I don’t have any expertise on that, and it is not relevant to the single-at-heart topic of this blog, so I am going to go off topic for the day. I want to point to two examples of ways of understanding schizophrenia and other mental health issues – the scholarly and the personal.


Escape from Loneliness: Is Marriage the Answer?

Monday, October 6th, 2014

Some of the prevailing beliefs about single people seem so intuitive that it is hard to take seriously the possibility that they are just stereotypes. One of those is that single people are lonely, and that getting married takes care of that. After all, isn’t it obvious that married people “have someone” whereas single people do not?

Over the past decade, studies have been piling up suggesting something quite different. Representative national surveys have shown that single people are more likely to visit, support, contact, and advise their parents and siblings than are married people. Singles are also more likely to encourage, socialize with, and help their friends and neighbors.

The results of studies comparing people of different marital statuses at one point in time are just suggestive. We can’t know from such “cross-sectional” research whether any differences in social ties are really about marital status or about something else connected to marital status (such as age or education or personality or, really, just about anything). Better studies follow the same people over time as, for example, they get married or get unmarried. Do their social connections change?


Are Married People Really Outnumbered? Does It Matter?

Friday, October 3rd, 2014

shutterstock_208650805Recently, Bloomberg News declared that for the first time, more than half of American adults are single – they are either divorced or widowed or they have always been single. In numbers, that amounts to 124.6 million people; in percentages, it is 50.2 percent. The report inspired an outpouring of “what does it all mean” opinion pieces.

Around the same time, the Census Bureau was releasing its annual “Facts for Features” report to mark Unmarried and Single Americans Week, September 21-27. That report claimed that 105 million people, or 44 percent of all American adults, are single.

So which is it? And does it matter?


Caring about Children and Their Future: Is It a Parent Thing?

Monday, September 29th, 2014

shutterstock_161985149In the lead-up to the Climate Change Summit, a famous actor (I don’t remember who; I’m not good with celebrities) was asked why he was so committed to the cause. He said it was because he had children and he cared about their future.

I’ve heard those kinds of comments repeatedly, and not just around the topic of climate change. With regard to just about any issue that unfolds over time, parents step forward to say that they care about it because of their kids.


Record Number of Americans Will Stay Single for Life

Friday, September 26th, 2014

shutterstock_150476522The most recent report from the Pew Research Center offered a remarkably important, data-based prediction:

“…when today’s young adults reach their mid-40s to mid-50s, a record high share (25%) is likely to have never been married.”

Think about that. There will be a time, in the not-too-distant future, when one out of every four American adults, at age 50, will have been single all their lives! That is a huge number.


To Your Health! 4 Ways Singles Have More to Celebrate

Tuesday, September 23rd, 2014

shutterstock_167694947The third full week in September is Unmarried and Single Americans Week. The Census Bureau has been marking the occasion every year with a special press release rounding up the latest facts and figures. Sadly, most news organizations just ignore the occasion. Those who do give it a nod, such as the Washington Post, mostly just reiterate the key points from the Census Bureau – for example, that 105 million Americans, 18 and older, are single (either divorced or widowed or always-single).

Over at Health.com, though, Amanda MacMillan did something more ambitious: She rounded up 7 empirically-documented ways in which being single affects your health. Here, according to the article, are 4 ways in which singles have more to celebrate, health-wise, than married people do:


Prejudice in the Bedroom: How Many Pillows Does a Single Person Need?

Saturday, September 20th, 2014

shutterstock_204548422Some societies, such as Finland, care deeply that every citizen has a respectable standard of living. A report on what should count as a decent minimum standard of living in Finland begins like this:

“In recent years, the level of basic security has dropped, and the income of those relying on basic benefits has clearly fallen behind that of the rest of the population though they should guarantee all citizens the right to receive essential subsistence and care, even if their income is insufficient for this or the household faces a situation creating a risk, such as unemployment…”

To try to determine what should count as a decent minimum standard of living, studies were conducted with focus groups and other discussion groups. Participants were asked to specify the level of goods that “facilitates a decent minimum standard of living in which physical, psychological, and social basic needs are met and that enables participation in society.”


 

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