giftWhen I was a kid, I used to love getting Christmas presents. Birthday gifts, too. Now as an adult, I love giving them – when I can think of something that seems like just the right thing for the person I have in mind.

There is a particular present that I have often wanted to give but always hesitated to do so because I wasn’t sure what the recipient would think. That’s the gift of contributing, in the recipient’s name, to someone who needs a gift far more than anyone in my gift-exchange community.

This year, with so many people struggling, I decided that it was time to give the kind of gift I’ve pondered for so many years. I know that food banks are having an especially hard time keeping up with the need, so that’s one of my choices.

I also like the kinds of gifts that keep on giving. In the catalog, there is a Gardner’s Basket that includes everything needed to start a sustainable farm. You can give the whole thing, or just a share of it. The individual shares are especially affordable options.

I was really excited about this until I read the detailed description. Here are the parts that disappointed me:

 “This basket represents everything a family will need to start a sustainable farm…

 Just as the garden grows, so will your gift as one family eventually passes on the same gifts they received to another family in need.”

Ut-oh. Is Heifer discriminating against single people? I called to find out. The first person who answered said no. I insisted on sending my query up the chain of command, so I could be reassured by more than one person that I was not going to be subsidizing an organization that practices singlism. Everyone assured me that there was no such discrimination. I asked for an address so I could put my concern in writing. They seemed to think that was an odd request. (Writing? What’s that?) I found it on my own.

I have nothing against giving to families. I just don’t want to support an organization, however worthy, that discriminates against single people.

I took their word that needy single people are among the recipients of these gifts, and placed my orders. I really do like the idea of a garden that keeps growing and growing. It is even better than a gift-of-the-month club in the abundance that it generates.

If gift-giving is part of your holiday celebration, I hope you have found some particularly meaningful presents, too.

[To browse other blogs about single life, check out Single with Attitude.]

Gift photo available at Shutterstock.



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    Last reviewed: 14 Dec 2011

APA Reference
DePaulo, B. (2011). A Year for Especially Meaningful Gifts. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 31, 2014, from



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