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The Question Sex Addiction Critics Don’t Want You to Ask…..

Guest Blog - Stefanie Carnes PhD, LMFT, CSAT-S

Over the years I have developed a tremendous amount of respect for Dr. Stefanie Carnes and her work as both a clinician and a trainer of clinicians. Currently, she serves as President of the International Institute for Trauma and Addiction Professionals and as a National Clinical Consultant for Elements Behavioral Health. She is also the author of numerous well-regarded...
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Wake Up California Therapists! Protecting Client Confidentiality per Proposed California Law AB 1775

The Current Situation vs. AB 1775

For a very long time, California psychotherapists have been required to break client confidentiality only when we believe a minor or dependent adult is in imminent danger of serious abuse or neglect or a life is imminently at risk (homicide and/or suicide with a clear plan). Over the years this has enabled us to privately counsel countless men and women seeking help with discontinuing illegal or potentially harmful behaviors, or with diminishing shame and self-hatred over past misconduct. Many of us have helped these individuals develop and maintain healthier, happier, and safer lives - without needing to break our vow of confidentiality.
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Therapists and Clients: Common Problems and How to Avoid Them

Therapists Are Not Perfect

As therapists, each of us would like to do exactly the right thing in each and every session. However, given the stressful nature of our work, the lengthy and sometimes sporadic hours, the occasional inability to feel secure in our continued income, and even our own not-yet-totally-resolved issues, we sometimes fall a bit short of this lofty goal. Simply put, despite our good training, supervision, and continuing education, we occasionally make errors. A few of the more common therapeutic missteps are discussed below, along with suggestions on how to avoid them. That said, professional organizations have guidelines that are (and always should be) a therapist’s first line of defense in this regard. Plus, without doubt I’ve missed a few things. If so, please add your thoughts on those issues in the comments section. That way, anything I’ve overlooked will still be discussed.
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Do You Want to be Happy?

What is Happiness?

As a therapist, I often encounter clients who say things like: “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I have everything I want and yet I never feel satisfied. There’s no joy in my life. Maybe I’m just not a happy kind of person. Maybe I’m just a glass-half-empty person.” When I get hit with that sort of proclamation, I typically respond with a few probing questions: “What would happiness look like and feel like for you? How would you know if you had achieved it?” Sadly, much of the time these “unhappy” clients simply don’t have an answer. For them, happiness seems so elusive that they can’t even picture it.
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Understanding LGBTQ-Affirmative Psychotherapy

I don’t understand the concept of having a “gay agenda.” In my belief system caring people closely hold to a “human agenda” of loving, accepting, and helping all people.
What are L, G, B, T, and Q?

We live in a heteronormative society. In other words, heterosexual relationships are the cultural norm, and anything different is, well, different. Yes it is true that things are changing rapidly in parts of the Western world and elsewhere - evolving societal attitudes about cultural diversity, softening religious dogma, the repeal of DOMA and the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, growing intolerance of pejorative terms like “faggot,” “homo,” and “dyke,” legalized gay marriage, and more - but this doesn’t mean that people whose sexual orientation and/or gender identity falls outside the norm suddenly have an easy time of it. In fact, these individuals typically experience, at best, confusion (not just from others but within themselves) about who/what they are why/how they are different. In fact, sometimes even psychotherapists are unsure about
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Men and Depression: Not Just the Same Sad Face

Feeling Down?

Scenario 1: Joan, a 32-year-old working mother of two young children

Joan arrives in therapy complaining that over the past six to eight months she has experienced growing feelings of both sadness and fatigue. She admits to frequent crying jags over what she accurately describes as relatively minor incidents. She also reports difficulty falling asleep, usually because she’s worrying that her children need more from her than time allows. As a result she is fatigued, easily prompted to tears, spaced out, and increasingly forgetful. The final straw for Joan was when she inadvertently locked her toddler son in the family car with the keys inside (requiring a visit from the local AAA truck to free both her son and her SUV). The following day, after a long talk with her husband, who encouraged her to seek help for her general unhappiness, she reached out to a local psychotherapist. After reviewing Joan’s history and stated symptoms over the course of several sessions, Joan’s therapist diagnosed her as being in the middle of a moderate depressive episode. The therapist gave her a referral for medication evaluation, and continued to work with her in therapy - focusing on helping her to better manage stress and to feel more confident as a mother.
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