In a previous post to this site, I discussed how therapists can clinically define and diagnose porn compulsivity/addiction (as a form of Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder), and how problematic, compulsive porn use typically manifests in a persons life. In this post, I am focused on the most common consequences of this type of porn use.

People who struggle with the compulsive use of pornography nearly always find themselves leading stressful, highly compartmentalized lives. Because they feel so much personal, cultural, religious, and/or moral shame about their porn use, they hide this behavior from family, friends, and everyone else who matters to them. Often, their shame prevents them from seeking help for their problem. And when they do reach out, they tend to ask for help with anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem rather than directly addressing their underlying issue of pornography. Many heavy porn users spend months or even years in therapy without ever discussing (or even being asked about) their secret sexual life.

Of course, shame is hardly the only consequence that people experience related to heavy porn use.

Research tells us that compulsive porn users experience a wide variety of directly and indirectly related problems. For example, a survey of 350 self-identified sex and porn addicts conducted by UK therapist Paula Hall identified the following issues:

Shame 70.5% Low Self-Esteem 65.0% Mental Health Issues 49.8% Loss of a Relationship 46.5% Sexual Dysfunction 26.7% Serious Suicidality 19.4% Sexually Transmitted Disease 19.4% Other (Non-STD) Physical Health Problems 15.7% Debt 14.7% Impaired Parenting 14.7% Legal Actions Against 06.0% Loss of Employment 04.1% Press Exposure 00.9%

Regardless of the study and who conducted it, the primary consequences of compulsive porn use tend to boil down to shame, mental health issues, relationship woes, and sexual dysfunction. At the very least, these are the issues that seem to drive heavy porn users into treatment.

Shame and Low Self-Esteem

As stated above, compulsive porn users often feel personal, cultural, religious, and/or moral shame about their behavior. If an individual was raised in a home or a religion or a culture that frowns upon porn use, that person cant help but feel defective and less than for using it. And even individuals who are not externally shamed for using pornography may feel internal shame about it, especially if pornography is their primary or only sexual outlet. In such cases, they may feel lonely and embarrassed about their failure to engage sexually in the real world, and, over time, this can eat away them, diminishing their self-esteem in all areas of life.

Mental Health Issues

The link between mental health issues and pornography will be discussed in detail in a future posting to this site. For now, I will simply state that common mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and even suicidality are often linked to compulsive porn use. The cause and effect relationship is not always clear, however. It appears mental health issues can result from compulsive porn use; it also appears that mental health issues can create emotional discomfort and a need to numb out through the compulsive use of pornography (or compulsive gambling, alcoholism, drug abuse, binge eating, etc.) Either way, there is an undeniable link between heavy porn use and a variety of mental health issues.

Relationship Woes

Individuals who are in committed, supposedly monogamous relationships may or may not be committing infidelity by using pornography, depending on how the couple has defined monogamy and the boundaries of their relationship. Either way, if porn use escalates to the level of compulsivity, the relationship cant help but be negatively impacted. When porn use is compulsive, it starts to override everything else thats important, including intimate connections. When porn is placed ahead of the users primary romantic relationship in this way, strife is inevitable.

Sexual Dysfunction

Depending on the research, anywhere from 17 percent to 58 percent of men who struggle with pornography report issues with erectile dysfunction (ED), delayed ejaculation (DE), or inability to reach orgasm (anorgasmia). Often, this is the most disturbing consequence of compulsive porn use, especially among younger male users. And without a doubt, this issue is increasingly common. Stated simply, growing numbers of physically healthy men, including men in their sexual prime, are suffering from sexual dysfunction related to their use of pornography.

And no, this issue is not linked to frequency of masturbation and orgasm (i.e., the need for a sexual refractory period in which males reload, so to speak). In actuality, the problem is tied to the fact that when a male spends the majority (or all) of his sexual life masturbating to online pornography endless images of visually perfect (whatever that means to the user), constantly changing partners and experiences he is, over time, likely to find a real-world partner or a simple sexual fantasy less than stimulating. For these individuals, online porn creates an emotional and psychological disconnect that manifests physically as sexual dysfunction.

Even worse, this sexual dysfunction affects not just male porn users but their romantic partners. If a guy cant get it up, keep it up, or reach orgasm, then his partners sexual pleasure and self-esteem are also likely to be diminished. Many heavy porn users find themselves ending an existing relationship with someone they genuinely care about because of the shame they feel when they cant perform sexually, or their partners end it for them because they don’t feel a healthy sexual and romantic connection and don’t know why.

If you or someone you know is struggling with compulsive or addictive porn use, please visit the free resource website SexandRelationshipHealing.com for assistance and guidance. To receive specialized treatment for porn compulsivity/addiction, contact Seeking Integrity.